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Old Aug 07, 2017, 12:17 AM
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Started writing the most recent trauma down, or what sparked all the others to come alive again. It's hard, even now. I've had to stop and take breaks while writing it. The T wanted it hand written but not sure I can do that. I had carpal tunnel surgery and my hand and wrist are stiff now. So holding a pen for very long in painful. I guess she can either accept it or not.
Has anyone else written down their trauma in vivid detail? I've been crying a lot and feel like I want to throw up.......still. I just finished PE therapy on this, it shouldn't be bothering me this much still to tell this.
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Old Aug 07, 2017, 12:27 AM
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In my head I have, to the last bit. But going into details on any medium would make me throw up. I just could not do it...
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Old Aug 07, 2017, 12:36 AM
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Originally Posted by bearguardian View Post
In my head I have, to the last bit. But going into details on any medium would make me throw up. I just could not do it...
It's hard but once you get it done for some reason you feel better. I wrote it and told it so many times though maybe it's just getting easier but still hurts. The first couple of times I almost didn't do it. Got to keep your eye on the prize after all this, ya know?
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Old Aug 07, 2017, 03:40 AM
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I started, but 'ran away' every time I got to the most affecting parts. For me, writing about it deposits me in that raw, painful place.
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  #5  
Old Aug 07, 2017, 01:31 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Trace14 View Post
Started writing the most recent trauma down, or what sparked all the others to come alive again. It's hard, even now. I've had to stop and take breaks while writing it. The T wanted it hand written but not sure I can do that. I had carpal tunnel surgery and my hand and wrist are stiff now. So holding a pen for very long in painful. I guess she can either accept it or not.
Has anyone else written down their trauma in vivid detail? I've been crying a lot and feel like I want to throw up.......still. I just finished PE therapy on this, it shouldn't be bothering me this much still to tell this.

My heart goes out to you. It's so, so hard.

I did this last year (not at all handwritten though) when Disaster 2 told me that I needed to write a trauma narrative. I typed 25 1/2 pages, in very embarrassing detail, until I needed to stop. I wasn't even through year 1 of my adult traumas. I just couldn't do it anymore because she wasn't supporting me or helping me deal with everything that came up as I wrote it. She never read it. I did let C read it. I needed him to know what he was dealing with. There were things in there that I have never told anyone, ever. He was so amazed that I was able to get as far as I did and called me brave. He has not asked me to continue writing because we aren't ready to get that deep into trauma just yet. He was very supportive though and thanked me many times for trusting him with it. It actually did help me a lot though. He has a great memory and when we are talking about something that was in those writings, I don't have to say it out loud because he already knows.

Just because you did PE doesn't make this easy! You are having very normal reactions! Writing those things in vivid detail is probably one of the hardest things we have to do. You are brave and you can do it! Just make sure to take care of you as you continue!
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Old Aug 07, 2017, 08:07 PM
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Originally Posted by nyc artist View Post
My heart goes out to you. It's so, so hard.

I did this last year (not at all handwritten though) when Disaster 2 told me that I needed to write a trauma narrative. I typed 25 1/2 pages, in very embarrassing detail, until I needed to stop. I wasn't even through year 1 of my adult traumas. I just couldn't do it anymore because she wasn't supporting me or helping me deal with everything that came up as I wrote it. She never read it. I did let C read it. I needed him to know what he was dealing with. There were things in there that I have never told anyone, ever. He was so amazed that I was able to get as far as I did and called me brave. He has not asked me to continue writing because we aren't ready to get that deep into trauma just yet. He was very supportive though and thanked me many times for trusting him with it. It actually did help me a lot though. He has a great memory and when we are talking about something that was in those writings, I don't have to say it out loud because he already knows.

Just because you did PE doesn't make this easy! You are having very normal reactions! Writing those things in vivid detail is probably one of the hardest things we have to do. You are brave and you can do it! Just make sure to take care of you as you continue!
Haven't dealt with it today. It's a rainy blah day, just not into it today.
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