Making Peace with internal self

Anyone else have a conflict going on inside them about dealing with CPTSD and therapy? That it always has to be a fight going on about something.

Is this just another avoidance issue?

I go through periods of time where I really see how deeply CPTSD impacts me and that the best course of action is to continue to work through things, learn more techniques to keep me grounded and able to concentrate and focus. Then I move into a period of time (heading there now) where I think that I should be able to just deal with, ignore it and move on. But even during those times when I'm in my denial stage, I do have moments that I realize that the impacts of CPTSD are real and aren't just going to go away.

I think this new denial stage I'm going into isn't going to last long. There are a lot of bad vibes at work and the stress is building there. Yesterday was pretty bad. I see next week as being very challenging. There are a lot of projects coming up that I have a significant role in, and the deadlines are very tight.

Wouldn't it be nice to just operate as a calm person? To not get so anxious about small things, which snowball into bigger things. ~sigh~

Yeah I haven’t found telling myself I “should deal with it, ignore it and move on” helps - I’d love to be able to move on from all the crap in my head and all the horrible anxiety etc etc

I wish it were easier to forgive and forget. ((((((((((((Fuzzy)))))))))))))