[SunflowerWannabe]

This morning I had yet another massive panic attack. And when I went to post about it here afterwards I realised something. I think the reason nothing works to calm me down (rational thinking, deep breathing, meditation, calming music etc) is because my mind subconsciously doesn't want me to - calming down/not panicking would mean letting my guard down and that is when really bad things happen.

I am always on edge, waiting for the next bad thing (my life has been a long series of really bad things), and I think that's what the near constant anxiety and panic is about - I can't believe I never connected the dots here, I just associated the panic with whatever set me off (a social event. a trigger in a movie, going to work, etc).

Does anyone else feel like this?

[winter4me]

Good insight. I believe that this has been true for me.

[TishaBuv]

I agree. It’s a natural reaction to feel jumpy after you’ve been scared, for example. I grew up in a dangerous city, and even though I live in a safer suburb now, I still always lock my doors, for example, while others leave them wide open. (Foolish them, right?)

Have you tried a med for anxiety? Ask your doctor. I am taking an anti anxiety med now and it is definitely helping me.

I’ve also had a series of big traumatic things happen. I’m really glad that I don’t get flustered from the medium or small stuff, too, for the most part. We just had a huge leak in our house and have to tear out the wall and deal with the expense and anxiety of working with the repairs and insurance people and it bothers my husband hugely, yet doesn’t bother me at all.

I consciously choose to avoid triggers where I can though to protect myself. Too much is unavoidable.

[SunflowerWannabe]

I've been to see the GP today, he says the propranolol I've been taking (40mg x3 per day) is the best he can give me alongside the lamotrigine and mirtazapine. He's not my usual GP so I might see if I can see her and ask what she thinks.

I avoid triggers where I can, but I have so many its impossible! I have a real issue with being trapped (always have to have my back to a wall, know where the door or window is, can't have anyone standing over me or blocking my way, and the list goes on and on), so whenever I feel overwhelmed (which is a lot with BPD), I feel trapped and tend to panic.

I've been reading today about DBT, meditation, yoga, etc., so am hoping to learn some better coping methods to get me through days like this one.

[Ceara1010]

I have successfully calmed down from panic attacks using DBT. I think the most important thing I learned was not to fight the panic because that just makes things worse. I welcome the feelings and then meditate, listen to soothing music, or watch comedy on TV, anything that will distract me. I used to panic daily and needed to take Ativan to calm down but thanks to DBT, I can't remember the last time I had a panic attack. There's some great DBT workbooks you can find on Amazon.

Hang in there! It takes a little work to learn DBT skills, but it's so worth it and I'm sure if you do this, you will learn to manage your feelings.

hugs, Ceara

[Lilfae]

That sounds very likely! Thanks for sharing! I have a hard time calming down from anxiety too, and panic attacks.

[Fuzzybear]

[Kathleen83]

I used to take xanax for the panic attacks - until a different GP put me on Citalopram. Her thought was, the xanax helped calm the panic attack down, the citalopram would help prevent it. I'm sure I explained that poorly - but - that's the general gist of it. It worked. No more panic attacks. No more anxiety attacks, either. Phobias - the only thing that helped with that was going thru the gut wrenching fear of facing them - sort of exposure therapy. Had someone I really trusted by my side the entire time I went thru that process, which helped. I'd usually fail when I started, but kept facing those demons down until I could overcome. EMDR therapy helped me some with the CPTSD....until therapist stopped that, because of dissociation. Now I'm in DBT, and it's helping some. So to get back to your question of does anyone else feel like you are, yes. I do. My triggers and reactions protected me for a very long time, in very bad situations. I have to fight the thought that if I keep doing therapy and meds, it will somehow all "go away", and THEN how will I protect myself? The counter argument I use is, it's not GOING to go away, doesn't NEED to. The strengths and abilities I have because of the CPTSD are still going to be there. Then meds and therapy are just to help me from over-reacting when a situation doesn't warrant such a response. To give me even MORE tools to deal with situations. Yay, you, for the incredible insight into yourself, connecting the dots!

[LearnToLoveTheRide]

Hi SunflowerWannabe

Congratulations on the self-awareness. We have to treat this ourselves if we really want to get better.

The Sympathetic Nervous System (SNS) response is a natural response. It's our Fight, Flight, or Fright response and it kept us alive for hundreds of thousands of years. It protects us from danger. The problem occurs when we can't get out of it, or activate our Parasympathetic Nervous System (PNS) response. That's our Rest and Digest response. Being stuck in an SNS response creates hypervigilance, anxiety, panic attacks, and all sorts of other problems that we're familiar with.

So, it's healthy to have a working response that keeps us safe, but it's unhealthy when that response becomes the only response we have.

Xanax didn't help me for my panic attacks, and Citalopram was completely ineffective as well. What does work for my panic attacks is Clonazepam. I take 2mg twice a day which is quite a high dosage but it really settles the SNS response and allows my body and brain to calm down and stay calm.

Stay safe, but try and relax when you are safe. LTLTR