[clouds_and_sun]

...I have a really hard time coping with a lot of negative things and one of the things I hate is being left out, bullied or ignored,I get really depressed and angry cause I was emotionally neglected as a child and my peers left me out a lot I was also bullied.
I am one of these people that when I leave my hurt feelings or anger inside (not let it out) I will end up hurting myself (self harm). So I have to vent, some how I need to get it out, the pain the hurt.
Recently I was left out of a group of people who used to like me but stopped cause of an awful toxic rumor about me. I have been so hurt about that for a while. Today there was a trigger for me about it.
Today I let my frustrations out on a comment board (a board where as you can post a comment without logging in or having an account), my rant (comment) had nothing to do with the topic that the comment board was about, I just needed to get my hurt out, somehow, just to cope.
Has anyone on here ever done that (gone to a comment board to get your hurt out as in ranted about how hurt you are)?
I just don't know how to cope with being left out, being ignored and/or being bullied since this happened most of my life and my parents never showed me how to cope, mother drank to ease her hurt and my father lived in a world of money, that was his life, nothing else mattered to him really.
My coping skills are awful.

[clouds_and_sun]

I have got to learn not to express my feelings so much.

[Whisper of help]

You say that if you hold in your emotions, you end up self harming. So how will showing less emotion help any? You need to talk about it, before things get to this critical point. Talk, and vent, about things that bug you, before it all builds up. If it's a little thing? Complain about it to someone, and you can both laugh it off later. If it's a big thing, you can come here or go to a friend that is willing to listen, and help if you need it.

I'd offer myself, but I've had my own method of coping, which is shutting it all out. So I can't really empathize much, and I can't really understand what you go through the way someone else could.

[clouds_and_sun]

Originally Posted by Whisper of help

You say that if you hold in your emotions, you end up self harming. So how will showing less emotion help any? You need to talk about it, before things get to this critical point. Talk, and vent, about things that bug you, before it all builds up. If it's a little thing? Complain about it to someone, and you can both laugh it off later. If it's a big thing, you can come here or go to a friend that is willing to listen, and help if you need it.

I'd offer myself, but I've had my own method of coping, which is shutting it all out. So I can't really empathize much, and I can't really understand what you go through the way someone else could.

Thank you Whisper you have helped me out a lot

[Whisper of help]

I'm glad I could help, sun!

[(JD)]

Regardless of how you are and why you are that way and what you think etc.... you could try writing down those negative thoughts on a sticky note... well, rather, write down the reframe, such as: It's ok if I'm ignored. It's ok if I get left out. That will help change your thinking... really...by reading it often.

Because... it is you know... ok? How they treat you has no bearing on how you really are. It sounds like their loss, to me.

[danvb]

My heart goes out to you.

Truly.

It is always so much easier to believe all of the negative things that you tell yourself about who you think you are instead of believing and KNOWING all of the wonderful, loving and amazing things that make up who you REALLY are. It's true. You aren't alone in that respect. Most people do that. Most people readily believe all the bad stuff about themselves and completely blow off all the really cool, good stuff. You know, all the TRUE stuff. Yup. That's what happens. Sound familiar?

People tell themselves so many things that are based on nothing more than what they want to believe to be true, not what is really true. For instance, does telling yourself that you're not a good person actually make it so? Nope. You just THINK and believe that you're not a good person. You see, what you tell yourself and what is actually REAL is usually two entirely different things. Chances are, in fact, that you really ARE a very cool person. You just haven't learned to recognize yourself for who you really are yet.

I know that this all sounds like a lot of "self-help" baloney. But actually, it's all true stuff.

I wish for you contentment and the will to learn to BELIEVE all the amazing things about yourself... even if right now you don't really think that such things could possibly be true.