[Kar98]

Don't judge me from this, I didn't even think this was possible, but I think I fell in love with a character from a book. Yeah, a book character.

I'd rather not say which book because it's an often controversial book and there's been people who have told me that that's what I get for reading a book filled with the evils of magic. I'm a 13 year old guy and I have very few friends because I'm homeschooled. When my first girlfriend broke up with me, I was hurt pretty bad (I suppose that's a given) and I was left yearning for love again. I started reading this book series and I started feeling more and more in love with one character. Quite frankly, the author had engineered a girl who was everything that I wanted. When the book became a movie, that didn't help because it only confirmed that she was beautiful (applause to the actor.) When I finished the series and I had to zap myself back into reality, I felt the exact same way I did when my ex-girlfriend broke up with me.

Did I really fall in love with a book character or am I just even more lonely now that I've figured out exactly what I'm looking for?

I can't go to my parents because when I told them I had a girlfriend they laughed at me and then told me I was too young to understand what love is. The fact that I had a girlfriend became part of many jokes at the dinner table and I was often the butt of them, and though I tried to laugh it off and I finally got through it, I don't want to do it again. I'm afraid that now I'm a year older and they're going to do it all over again, and then this time they're going to give me "The Talk," which I honestly don't want. I already understand and I'm not interested in...that stuff...anyways.

[Leed]

Hi Kar ~ First, I think it's horrible for family members to 'make fun' of you, and make you the butt of their jokes just because you had a girlfriend. I don't see anything 'funny" about it. It's a perfectly normal thing!!! Some understanding would have been nice especially when she broke up with you!

I'm not sure you 'fell in love with a book character.' It's probably more like you fell in love with the idea of being in love. The movie just put a face on it.

You're a very intelligent and mature young man. These feelings can be difficult -- and being a teenager is extremely difficult because our family usually treats us younger than we are -- or else they pooh-pooh our feelings, just telling us "it's part of growing up." Well, they need to be more understanding and aware that teenagers are often miserable -- our emotions are all over the place, plus we're learning about love for the first time, and that in itself can be difficult. Parents need to remember what it was like when THEY were young!!!

I'm sure you'll get thru this ok -- but be prepared because you'll probably feel like this many times. We often have an idealized vision of love, and it's not always like that. It can be difficult and painful -- but it can be awesome too! I must say that it's a learning experience!

Take care & best of luck. Hugs, Lee