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#1
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i've always been very emotional, especially when i wasn't stable (bipolar). as much as i hate it, i've always been kind of a "hopeless romantic". i don't think that's going to change. i guess my body (or mind) is exhausted from all the extreme ups and downs, so when my 4 1/2 year relationship ended, i got desensitized. i loved it and still love it. i was able to plan for myself, my own future, and start motivating and stay motivated. being the unfortunate "hopeless romantic" i am, when a guy came along who seemed good-more importantly stable i got in a relationship, but stayed detached. he had been making efforts and compromises, so i decided to open up just a little bit more. and now i'm at the point that i was trying so hard to stay away from.
i have not been this upset with myself in such a long time, because i thought the breakup was the reason i'm in such a deep hole; but i thought about it and i had a long and exhausting week already and this was the cherry on top. i have felt/have been feeling so many negative emotions all at once this weekend, i didn't know what to do. thankfully i didn't get to the worst state, but i feel like it won't be a better result if this happens again. i'm wondering if anyone has felt all these emotions at once (anger,sadness,frustration,resentment, self-loathe,etc.etc.) and if you did, how did you cope with it?
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"I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it" - Audrey Hepburn ![]() ![]() ![]() "The only easy day was yesterday" - U.S. Navy SEALS
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#2
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yes i know exactly what your talking about! my boyfriend is now about to experience me pushing him away whilst i battle with these demonic feelings. Like you they all come at once and i get paralysed mentally with it all.
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![]() PrincessxKitty
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#3
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it really sucks and i'm got upset with myself for letting myself get to this point. i might be a little too hard on myself, but i'm just so scared that every time i get to this point it'll only get worse and harder to stop myself from self-destructing (give up on everything, unable to eat, exercise)
i just know that if i didn't have other problems i was dealing with, the breakup would not affect me that much. now i feel like i'm making myself think it's a big deal and use it as a scapegoat in a way... ![]()
__________________
"I was born with an enormous need for affection, and a terrible need to give it" - Audrey Hepburn ![]() ![]() ![]() "The only easy day was yesterday" - U.S. Navy SEALS
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