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#1
Jun 24, 2013, 03:50 AM
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About this time last year I received my diagnosis. Mood disorder, bipolar 2. Tonight I saw the guy that caused such a catastrophic trigger that I was at a bridge several times and a knife to cut myself once. He's the reason i sought professional help to begin with. A year later I saw him again and had this overwhelming desire to hurt him. I would have been have been banned from the club at the least, arrested at the most. Now I'm on my way home ready to turn that destruction on myself. Good thing I'm not alone on the bus. Is there not a med that turns you totally numb so you never feel?
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May the pendulum come to rest so my soul can be at peace |
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#2
Jun 24, 2013, 04:07 PM
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I'm very sorry you are dealing with such violent thoughts. You need to be safe and not harm yourself . There just isn't a "pill" that will make you so numb you wont feel anything.
Do you have a Therapist ? If not you should find one , they can help you work through issues and triggers that cause you to feel such violence. Please take care of you and reach out for help,You can feel better.
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Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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