I have times where for whatever reasons I'm so consumed with rage I have thoughts of shooting, stabbing or beating someone to death. I know these are just thoughts but sometimes the urges feel incredibly intense. I know if I were to ever act on them my life would be effectively over but I find it very hard to control at times. Suppressing this rage isn't good for my health and sometimes I feel like I'm ticking timebomb. I'm almost hoping someone will want to start or pick a fight with me as an excuse to lash out.

[Alone & confused]

I get that way when I'm highly manic....maybe not "to death", but I do have the urge to get into a physical altercation. And yes, it's almost physically painful to try to suppress them! I get so enraged that I feel like I'm going to spontaneously combust! I hate it when I get that way because I'll lash out on ANYONE in my path! Fortunately though, so far I've only unleashed on people who UNDERSTAND that it was my disorder causing me to act like that. I'm really surprise that they stick around!

[ImNotHere]

I really know how you are feeling. I am so angry. I have these thoughts as well, about how much damage I could do to another person or how badly I could hurt someone. Part of me wishes someone would try and start something so I would have an excuse to release all this anger I am feeling. It is scary for me to think that I could potentially hurt someone or worse and I also know my life would be over if I did. I am so disappointed with the world and I am so angry at the people in it.

This is why I just try to avoid the world and wait for my medication to kick in and hopefully calm me.

Yes, I know these feelings. They scare me to death! I believe I would never act on any of them... but still... there's always that possibility... it prevents me from being completely certain.

[Thunder Bow]

When feelings go this far, it is time to seek help.

[ImNotHere]

Originally Posted by Thunder Bow

When feelings go this far, it is time to seek help.

I am in therapy and on medication but I still have these feelings, I don't know what other help I could get. I can relate a lot to how the OP is feeling.

I was in therapy as well. These thoughts go in cycles, right now I'm going through one.

[Thunder Bow]

Keep working with your therapist. Therapy process will often release anger during the course of therapy. Irrational anger towards others, mirror anger towards one self.

[ally123]

I have this but its part of the anxiety i have ocd primarily obsessive.. so i really fear acting on these thoughts and urges .. its hard to explain its like a little second video that plays in the mind as your muscles tense up and you see yourself punching someone in the face or whatever else it is you fear, i have sat on my hands the urge was so strong and i was certain i was going to lash out, have had these thoughts and feelings for over a year and besides crying or being snappy/moody i havent acted on them. I actually get them so bad that i avoid being around people, its scary to not trust yourself.. for me it has everything to do with fear of losing control as I get these thoughts even around people i would never want to hurt.