Their exaggeration = my reality

"I'm just extremely depressed today"
Well, you're most likely just sad, because you have a reason for feeling this way

"I'm always tired"
Honey, try living with narcolepsy

"My life is a mess"
Is it really your life? Because it seems like you've just been having a bad day today.

I don't know. I guess I just get a little frustrated with people sometimes. Because when you try to tell them your problems, the depth of it all doesn't come out, because they think you're exaggerating too.

Stories?

I never look as bad as I feel. So I don't really say much anymore as no one will believe me and I can't stand having people thinking I'm lying. Walking with people is a fricken nightmare, they will just run off and not care I can't keep up. I've realized no one will ever think of me as anything than lazy.

Cuz you don't LOOK sick.

It doesn't seem to matter that I have it black on white that I have a quite severe illness. I don't look the right kind of sick.

Even when people notice, weird comments like You look pale you'd look so much healthier if you stayed in the sun more.

Yea thanx. I just told you I have severe anemia and also my illness gets triggered by sunlight.

I realized it is better they think I'm healthy and lazy and when they get some trivial cold or headache that I just pretend to feel for them. A lot of people seem to have very limited understanding. I have to accept that or go crazier.

And try to limit the chores they put on me because "I'm home all day anyway". Yea, because I'm disabled but... I realized that never sinks in so I have to use other means to say no.

What makes you so sure they are exaggerating? Not everyone shows how they really feel inside on the outside. There are plenty of successful people who seem to have it all together but they are actually very depressed and under a lot of pressure inside. It’s sounds very self centered to think that only your problems matter and other people are just ‘exaggerating’.

I so can hear and relate to the frustration with this. I think people know not what they say at times and are looking for a bit of sympathy or just empathy with how they are feeling in the moment. What seems like exaggeration, sometimes, is the only way to express the misery they are experiencing and that can get them to a place where someone pays attention if they are feeling out of sorts and alone in their misery. This kind of coping mechanism can be so frustrating to deal with definitely. However, I have found patience, understanding, and kindness to be better teachers to break this habit and to help with reeducation for better coping mechanisms and to say what they really feel and need.

Here's a terrific blog about a woman with a disabling disease who "looks fine." She does a fantastic job of explaining what it's like to look ok but not feel anywhere near ok.

The Spoon Theory written by Christine Miserandino | But You Dont Look Sick? support for those with invisible illness or chronic illness

Yeah, I hate it when people can't validate. In situations like these, I can't voice out my complaints of feeling invalidated because people either think I am too needy (when I am not and I am fairly objective) or they can't relate and they will downplay my concerns or they will offer tons of advice(with good intentions) to tell you to "shape up". And then I will end up hating or regretting to have expressed my feelings. And then I would end up speculating if I have expressed my concerns the wrong way or what. Then, I would also speculate if I should have just acted out my concerns dramatically to get attention, so that I can get a dignified attention - but I never try this route because I know I will regret trying to attention this way hehe

I think it is important at least for me to understand that I cannot force understanding on people. They are not where I am in life. I will be there for them if they get sick because I already know how it is. That I had no one is just how life is, unfair. My burden is for me only to carry, because life has decided that for me. I can make myself feel worse by thinking some nature of universal balance "should" give me a helping hand. But in reality I know if this is just for me to handle alone, I'd better just accept it.