[Macd123]

Its cost me big time because l have lost several people I really wanted in my life (women mostly). I feel like a ten year old and I am way beyond that – waaaaayyyyy beyond that. Most people go through relationships and learn how deal with other people (well this is not always the case – my parents didn’t really deal with each other for example). It takes practice which I sorely lack (I know what you’re saying go out and get some – oh lord if it was only that easy I would be king!). Inexperience makes me move at glacial speed with people – I have learned that this is deadly with women they won’t wait for you to grow up.. All I know that when they move away I cry like a kid – if the shoe fits. What’s a curse is that I have enough insight to see this shortcoming but not the guts to move. I don’t know when to be aggressive (not creepy) and when to give space. I can’t measure these accurately and its gonna kill me or at least keep me at a distance until I’m in a wheelchair drooling on myself. So how do I get the tools I need before its too late – I don’t know because I’m so far behind. Pass the pills please – these confessionals are hard.

[JJBX]

Well, maybe a safe way for you to gain some experience is by trying to attend a group setting like NAMI, where you can work through some of the barriers to you really feeling independent. You could meet people who are in a similar boat and try to figure out what's holding you back. Maybe it's something combined with emotional maturity, like trust issues or something. On your profile, you said that you have had some suicidal feelings, so maybe a group like NAMI would help.

[striking]

You mean the word assertive, not aggressive. There are lots of books on the subject available. The subject will be found under self-esteem too. Your age is unimportant, it is your willingness to change that matters.

Lots of women appreciate a man who asks her questions and gets to know her before requesting a date.