[x_BabyG_x]

Hi, im megan and im bipolar. I usually linger rather than post so quick introduction

Ive had a bad. bad week with the intensity of my emotions and I havent been able to control it whatsoever, they have been painful. Im all maxed out. Totally lashed out at my new-ish partner (1 year) for the first time. Im medicated and feeling a bit more rested today. now Im going over and over in my head the things ive said to people due to rage or upset or whatever.

annoyed/angry = pure rage
upset = devastation
loneliness = total emptiness
a spark of happiness = I want to stab my heart with a kitched knife and make it explode to release the intense and painful fluttering i feel.

Everything has been on the extreme end and it is painful. How do you explain that to someone? How do you make someone understand how intense you feel?

[CANDC]

Hi megan. Sorry you are annoyed, upset and lonely. There is a way to "release that hidden splendor inside" with finding a way to open up expression through art, music, helping people, and nature that is effective and non harming.

It is not easy at all to explain what you are going through if they have not. That is why Psych Central is so appropriate a place to share because there are so many compassionate people here.

Please feel free to private message me or any of the Community Liaisons (by left clicking on the name in blue to the left of their post) for questions or just to share.

[Fuzzybear]

[Crazy Hitch]

Thanks for the post here, I understand what you mean by linger. I enjoy reading posts because I think that there is so much I can learn from others and how they manage their situations and I ask myself what can I change in my own ways looking at strategies that have been useful for others so as to avoid me making the same mistakes again. I have Bipolar too

I am sorry to hear that your week has been a whirlwind of emotions. I've felt this way too which is why I wanted to respond to your thread.

I'm sorry there was some repercussions with your emotions with your partner, but you know what? Kuddos to you, it's been a year. It's not nice at all when there is this repercussion with our partners, but I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone. And I believe that if you've gone this strong for this long in your relationship, strategies can be put in place perhaps that could be used if you feel this way emotionally as you have this week. It's going to happen from time to time but I just don't want you to beat yourself up for it

I think sometimes pain / insecurity over situations can manifest themselves as anger.

Have you ever heard of the Anger Iceberg?

The Anger Iceberg:

10% of the Iceberg that you see floating above the sea level is anger / rage / loss of emotions.

What you don't see is the 90% below water.

90% below water = fear / insecurity / pain.

I think that you have a little bit of the Anger Iceberg happening and I know that this can be fixed.

Hang in there and please let us know how you go.

[x_BabyG_x]

Thank you guys it's been a difficult past few weeks but all is forgiven and forgotten. I'll learn from the experience. The anger iceberg, I totally get it!!

Thank you for all your replies, it means alot!!

[CANDC]

XBabyGx glad to receive your acknowledgement and praise.