[H3rmit]

Lately, for several days now, I've been having intense emotions for seemingly no great reason. I mean it's a very stressful time, and I'm not having any fun, so that can drive some of this. And I've been having a horrible time of the month (that female mood swing thing) but it's much worse than I can remember it being.

I'm finding it really hard to take, to cope with, and to get things done. All I'm doing is doing less, trying to take it easy on myself, and wracking my brains for something fun. Even meditation isn't cutting through this.

I don't know what to do. It's so painful. I'm profoundly sad, often, and I get angry as well. It's like dark, cold, stormy seas in here. I wish it would settle down.

[JadeAmethyst]

So sorry this is a rough time for you.

Sincerely,
Jade

[H3rmit]

Thanks. I'm really suffering. Wish I knew what else to do.

This is a very stressful time in my life and will be for the next 6 months. I have a recreational gardening project scheduled tomorrow after a challenging meeting. I hope it helps to get out in the sun and work.

[H3rmit]

Five months later, and things have gotten worse, not better. The stress was supposed to be because we were going to move somewhere . . . but we are still stuck here, now with the feeling and fear that we may be moving separately. This was the love of my life, my one and only. I am not ready to let go. It's painful to sit while he glares at me and tries to figure out if he can forgive me for my scary angry actions in the past. In the present, I am doing any kindnesses I can, and giving only loving truth. For example today I felt compelled to remind him that anger is destructive - the same problem he had with me - and it might be wisest to do some googling and learn to deal with his anger directly, so all that energy isn't blocking and harming both of us. I have learned. I have passed on the best resource I found. I have let him know the simple concept - use your senses to step down from emotions - breathe, walk, etc.

But of course then, you probably have to be ready to be honest and deal with whatever else is there. This is what he may not konw how to do, and I didn't go into this, as it won't matter if you aren't interested in the first step. He is overwhelmed. Senses can help get down from that. That was my loving truth for today.