lonely people

I have struggled with this issue for as long as I can recall. Even when I had friends, or was married, I felt surreal. Uncomfortable ~ as though I wasn't really there. Not a pleasant experience!

After 16 years, my ex-husband gave up on me. I've left most of my family, because they hurt me a lot during my youth and adolescence. I do have 2 daughters, who I love dearly, but I only have them on the weekends during the school year. It is hard.

While I can work (P/T), and seem "okay" to those just glancing at me, I'm a wreck! I have a boyfriend ~ but let's just say that I have lowered standards, for 6 years or so. My bf isn't a jerk, don't get me wrong. We just disagree upon some real key issues to me. Yet, I continue to hold myself down. He won't change. My perspective isn't changing either. But, the thought of being completely alone 65% of the time.... that scares the heck out of me!! {I've already broken up and gone back to my bf 3 or 4 times now. } My bf lives in the same apartment building as I do, that's what really makes it messy for me.

Annnnyyyway, it really stinks. I'm sorry.

I have family and friends but I am hundreds if not thousands of miles away due to a career choice. It's hard starting over in a new state.

Lonely but hopeful for us all

i'm sorry to hear that.
i really hate that feeling, thinking of ourselves as a waste of space. there's times i just want to try to end it again but the depression soon turns into anger almost when i think about the problems people in all of our situations suffer - we're not a waste of space but without having anyone to care it feels like that.
it's something that's almost out of our control, my social anxiety began from a bad upbringing and got worse thanks to the bullying in high school.

reading people's posts here and sounds like they went through similar things.

honestly though, i know it will sound generic but you're not a waste of space. i used to think exactly the same but i found a passion i could dedicate myself to, eventually my results in bodybuilding became better and better and now i can't go anywhere without someone making a comment (which irritates me beyond belief because they equate bodybuilding to the meat-head stereotype)

is there something you're passionate about or a dream/goal you've had but maybe tucked away over the years?

one thing loneliness and isolation affords us is time to dedicate to a passion or craft!
some of the best musicians and artists who've ever lived suffered anxiety and isolation too.

I feel that way too goku23. I'm 28 and I've never been in a relationship. I have no friends. I live alone.

Sometimes life in itself seems like torture.

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Hi Goku, Thanks........Yeah, I write (and read a lot) and that's my main passion at the moment, but sometimes I'm even too depressed to do that.
It's hard to be interested in things when you feel so down.......but I'm trying.