[sinking]

Lving through each and every day, every single minute of it....
Just the thought of it makes me crazy and overwhelmed.
Baby steps dont work. i know i'll be there tomorrow or the whole day and just this is overwhelming to me.
so much that i keep drinking to feel less present and real. every day,, from 9 am.
i want a break from life.
how do i get it?

[smartiesparty]

You can't get a break from life, but you can get a break from what overwhelms you in life and get away from so-called toxic aspects. Did you seek out professional help to help you get through the difficult life you're living right now ? If you keep on trying to numb yourself with alcohol, everything will become harder. When your body reaches a high tolerance, alcohol will soon be added to the list to the toxic aspects.

[sinking]

I dont think i can, unless i stay in bed all day because everything is overwhelming... And even staying in bed all day would be horrible in the end so i dont think i have a way out. Alcohol is the only one thing helping me now. I dont want to go back to SH right now too scared to do that again. Already taking pills. Already in therapy. Already asking for help at AA, in forums like this, friendly chats, hotlines etc. Nothing helped. What remains???

[avlady]

i agree with smarties

[Thunder Bow]

What remains? It is the desire to heal.

[Takeshi]

“Man does not simply exist but always decides what his existence will be, what he will become the next moment. By the same token, every human being has the freedom to change at any instant.” -Viktor E. Frankl

Check other quotes from his book too, pick one you really like and try to live it, then you can try AA and other tools to help yourself. You CAN do this before or after you decide to get ****-faced.

People tends to focus on faults and imperfections often, you and I and everyone else is no exception. You are sum of many parts, you shed those parts that makes you now and what would be left? Remember, the survival rate of everyone here is at 100%.

Think of what have kept you here. My work of rebuilding myself started off like that. Look to your self and ask what needs to be done. I believe that absolutely no one would be able to tailor helps to fit to my specific needs. You're willing to work, you have been working. Unlike I, you are capable of setting goals in your life. Will power to stop. That has to come from somewhere.

Helps, opportunities, probabilities. There are so many things in play, and as many ways to see things. We all make decisions each and every day.

How many times have we heard things like this method or that worked for this person and not for the others? Helps are in abundance, if you are ready to find and use them. You've mentioned drinking, SH among other things, what would be the common thread?

Simplify, analyze your past efforts, tons you can do. Tomorrow could be the start of the day that would make your life million times better. Simple choices, multiple choices. To me at this point in life, it all comes down to what I would like to do.

His quotes on goodreads. I hope you find them, like them and let them help you be yourself.

[sinking]

I was going crazy so i got my sort of "break" going inpatient.... Mind doesnt stop but at least body can rest for a while...

[Takeshi]

Get well and take care. I hope your mind quiet down soon, you're gonna have to live with it.

[char12345]

i definitely need a break but i dont understand why i feel so guilty all the time. i feel so so guilty all the time and i dont understnad it.