[Yismymindblank12]

I have a rate neurological disorder diagnosed I'm March of 2013 but has it much longer since 2009.

It's called stiff person syndrome and yes I have gone to forums about this so I'm going to end it there and say.

I'm afraid from this I'll be one day very incapacited like before but permanent and I fear not being in a relationship with someone that loves me because someday I'll need a care taker before I get old.

It's truly terrified me even though I hide it behind my confidence that I know I can control some of it but like forums and Dr's say it's inevitable on how severe mine is I'll be much more immobile and can't drive or work or anything much.

I fear it so much. I just want someone here now.

[Anouk]

I am sorry that you have this going on and these fears as well.

I well understand that you want someone who can be there for you. I dont know what to suggest with that.

I have severe dystonia and other EPS from Anti-psychotic meds and have tried to put in place some safeguards for myself as I wish to keep living independently as much as possible.

Are there any programs where you are that you would qualify for with regard to things like household help, cleaning, shopping, getting meds etc?

Than might be a start.

I really wish I could help more, but I do understand your fears.