I have no friends. Not a single one. No one to call or text. I used to have friends. But they used me, abused me, and abandoned me (after my father died). The only support I have is from my therapist. It's not enough. And I'm draining her energy. Now, she has very strict boundaries with me. So, I'm left to myself and my horrible mind in-between sessions. I'd talk to my family, but they all hate me and they do not believe in mental health at all. I'm running in circles, chasing my own tail that I don't even have. It's exhausting.

[music-mum]

I feel the same lately. If you want to pm me we can chat?

[magicalprince]

Originally Posted by Milo16

I have no friends. Not a single one. No one to call or text. I used to have friends. But they used me, abused me, and abandoned me (after my father died). The only support I have is from my therapist. It's not enough. And I'm draining her energy. Now, she has very strict boundaries with me. So, I'm left to myself and my horrible mind in-between sessions. I'd talk to my family, but they all hate me and they do not believe in mental health at all. I'm running in circles, chasing my own tail that I don't even have. It's exhausting.

This must be really hard to deal with on an ongoing basis.

A lot of times I feel this way too. Tough living situation makes it hard to find some sane relationships.

But it's not that everyone hates you, it's more likely just that you're not exposed to enough people. The stuff with family, that's really toxic. Hope you can find some support.

[catlover21]

I feel this way sometimes. I will just lay in bed and cry thinking how I don't have any friends. I have reached out to a couple of friends from over 10 years ago through social media. Now I have 3 people that I can call and see occasionally. This suits me fine.

I wish you luck on your journey

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm sorry you're dealing with this...

[honeyB77]

Originally Posted by Milo16

I have no friends. Not a single one. No one to call or text. I used to have friends. But they used me, abused me, and abandoned me (after my father died). The only support I have is from my therapist. It's not enough. And I'm draining her energy. Now, she has very strict boundaries with me. So, I'm left to myself and my horrible mind in-between sessions. I'd talk to my family, but they all hate me and they do not believe in mental health at all. I'm running in circles, chasing my own tail that I don't even have. It's exhausting.

So relatable. Sending hugs your way. PM if would like to talk or the silence gets too loud.

This sounds very hard and I'm so sorry you are experiencing this. When I'm depressed I often feel as you do now. (((Hugs)))

[butterfly7878]

I understand. I live with my ex boyfriend. We were together for 3 years before we moved across the country together. We lasted about another year that was completely miserable and we still live together. He has totally moved on and is living the dream life while I get to sit at home and watch. It's torture. I know exactly how you feel about having no friends. I have just made up my mind to do whatever it takes to move out. Being alone is better than being forced to recognize that you're alone, you know? I don't know where you live, or who you are, but I'm here if you need a friend.

Thanks, everyone! You all are so sweet! Thank you for the kind words!

[shezbut]

((((( Milo16 )))))

I often feel the same way, gentle hugs sent to you.

[Candle in the wind]

Hey, Milo. I'm sorry to read your story and to hear the hard challenges your facing, I feel that way to at times especially about family. There are so many great and supportive people on here. You will find great new friends on here and the support you are looking for
You can as well P.M me anytime or i'll see you in chat.
BTW, i love your avatar,, it's adorable.

Originally Posted by Milo16

I have no friends. Not a single one. No one to call or text. I used to have friends. But they used me, abused me, and abandoned me (after my father died). The only support I have is from my therapist. It's not enough. And I'm draining her energy. Now, she has very strict boundaries with me. So, I'm left to myself and my horrible mind in-between sessions. I'd talk to my family, but they all hate me and they do not believe in mental health at all. I'm running in circles, chasing my own tail that I don't even have. It's exhausting.

Considering how you recently experienced the death of your father, I can see why you feel alienated from your social network. And let's face it, when death happens, people show you their true colors which sometimes comes as a horrible shock. I, too, lost my father when I was around your age and it immediately showed me who were my friends and who weren't. I lost a lot of friendships with the death of my father, but in hindsight, those people didn't deserve my friendship for the way they abandoned me when I needed them the most. Life has a way of showing us our friends' roles in our lives, when the going gets tough. The ones who bail, are fair weather. The ones who stick around, are true.

Right now you are grieving a huge loss, and as a result, puts you in a state of transition psychologically-speaking. If your therapist is your only source of support, I would ask her to connect you to a woman's center where you can join a women's grief support group. I did that for myself after I discovered that my college therapist was breaking the patient-confidentiality code, when she shared our session information with my mother who was smothering myself and my siblings at the time. I found a women's center, which allowed me to attend a grief support group for 6 weeks for free. So, the became another source of support to me. I also started a job, which was a nice distraction.

All I'm saying is, when you find your mind racing between your therapy sessions its because you have limited your source of support to your therapist. You need to expand your support system. Find a grief group if you can. Figure out what your passions are and distract yourself with those. Go out for walks, go for runs. Physical activity is a great treatment for depression and anxiety. The endorphins released from even a short 15 minute walk will relax your racing mind. Also, walking meditation or sitting meditation helps slow down racing thoughts.

You have your youth on your side. Read books. Chat and post here. Find a grief group of women. Exercise. Cuddle your cat. Watch silly movies. Journal. Create art. Take an African drum class or some kind of community ed class if you can afford to. And allow yourself to transition and grieve the loss of your father at your own pace. You will heal. It just takes time.

[csaki01]

The title of this thread caught my eyes... no... not everyone hates you... I have no reason to hate you!