conundrum, feel like a failure

Is this best in Depression? Relationships? Somewhere else? I'm not sure. It is here because I am in a flap. I am really feeling down and hard on myself. I am worried and at a loss about what to do. Coping? Not very well.

In several weeks it is my boyfriend's 65th birthday. My plan was for a simple night out. It seems I have disappointed countless others who have expected me to make a big deal out of this. A sister contacted me wanting to know where the reception would be. Good lord, was I expected to put one on? Was I expected to plan and coordinate this? Am I expected to feed all these people? Is there some unwritten rule of etiquette dictating I put on such a thing? Why would they wait until so late to confirm with me if I'd made such plans? Why would, if such a thing was expected, no one have stepped forward to offer me assistance? Why is this being sprung upon me? Am I really expected to have arranged all this?

I really feel like poop.

Just Keep it simple. Period!

If people want to throw your boy friend a big party then they can be the ones to plan it. I would keep it simple. You dont have to put on a big party to please people. If they are disappointed then thats there problem. It's ok to keep it simple

It’s amazing the ridiculous expectations people dump on us. I have never even heard if a reception for a birthday party. I agree with the others. If someone expects a party like let THEM do it. And pay for it too. You so feel what’s right for you.

thanks all

If his sister wants to have a bash, then why doesn't she?

I see nothing wrong with your plans.

Hmmm since when are half-decade birthdays supposed to require special celebrations?

35, 45, 55 - don't seem to get any special attention... Why 65?



If anyone gives you crap - ask them to explain to you why there is so much fanfare and specialness invested in this particular age/birthday... They won't be able to give you an adequate answer...