How are you coping today?

Not well. Jealousy is through the roof and I just want to cry.

I did have a good day today and I feel ok.I am having to cope with some blocks due to my anxiety.Like when I want to get chores done I get a bit OCD about how and when I do them and in what order,I work myself up into a state about it getting anxious then I block and can't do them and just leave them and it is frustrating then cos I get impatient and want to do them straight away as quickly as possible in one go.If I didn't get anxious and was patient and not such a perfectionist I would just do them without getting in a state about it.Like tomorrow there is a sink full of dishes to wash and a green compost bin to clean a very large one,grass needs cutting,bins need putting out,cat litter needs changing and tray washing,bathroom needs cleaning.

I imagine when I will do each chore and in what order a million times the day before,should I get the grass done first or is it best to leave that and get the washing up and green bin done,I will ruminate and be anxious over and over in my mind.

My worry right now is it is 2am and I am not asleep so will I wake up and have energy and time to do the chores tomorrow?

I work myself up into a state,my home needs to be perfect,but it is cluttered and needs constant attention to be kept nice.I was brought up by perfectionist parents and extended family so if things aren't looking perfect to me I get to suffer from a lot of shame and humiliation from my inner critic.This is what I cope with on a daily basis.

I have been very stressed today

not been feeling great

OK and I've managed to calm my jealousy a good amount so that it doesn't make me angry or sad.

Not very well today,struggled to get through the plans for the day and had to force myself to make food and go out,struggled to keep my temper,I was tired and irritable.Got home and conked out on the sofa,I felt guilty cos the kitchen was a mess and the sink full of washing up.I only just sorted that now at 10.30pm.I hated today and I hated myself today.To make things worse I had a pain in my hip lasted all of last night while I was in bed,and all of today and it is still not right now.

Not well because of narcissistic sadists.

Great. Our same struggle happened, as expected. I controlled my emotions, didn’t take a Benadryl, and am enjoying my day. No fight or flight.

felt pretty normal today.

2 acceptions: losing time in the afternoon, and being sworn at by someone (which I don't like)

I didn't do much, but didn't affect me much today

depressed, depressed, and depressed.

did so little with my day today it is unreal

No fight, flight, fawn or freeze?

These are CPTSD stuff.. I’m trying to learn more about this as I have it (wish I didn’t but I guess I can ggggggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr about it

Chugga chugga chugga chooo chooo (Thanks raging vortex for the train - I love it

struggled a lot with anxiety this morning- really struggled with it- was very high

distracted myself with a kids tv show I liked, went down a little but now it's up again a bit.

Ok. Acceptance of the bad treatment by my family. Not gonna let them at me again.

I am coping pretty well.

I had to go out for a little this morning which was sort of stressfull and overwelming, but I suppose I am now making up for that by listening to music at full volume and trying to relax- not think about earlier

I work to be grateful every day; some days are better than others, of course. Today, my focus is on putting my resume together and learning what I need to do to increase my blog's visibility.

Saw the main obsession thing when I was out today, and I didn't really get jealous. Maybe a bit but I definitely didn't get angry.

today I found out from a long time friend that one of the people she knew for 5 years (and I knew too), passed away

she emailed me asking for my support on the whole thing, because she's devistated and saddened by the loss- which honestly shocks me a little, when this guy was alive, he did nothing but boss us both around and go on about how he was better than both of us- so I am trying to support her, though it's difficult when I don't feel anything myself, and she's upset over someone who she hated

I got a phone call today from someone else I used to know, randomly rang me to tell me she got a new job at a furniture store. I was thrilled to hear from her, and we had a small catch up

had my shower today, and as usual felt gross after, really itchy and sore as well.

feeling okay mood wise I guess, despite realising that another week has passed and i've done **** all with my life and the time given to me. makes me wonder why I keep living, but their we go... some people are

To be honest I may seem ok outwardly but inside I am struggling to keep going and I just want to give up and not use up energy anymore.I am always so very tired physically.That is why I started this new diet,so that hopefully I can get more energy.I am going to try some Vitamin D as my test results came back insufficient on that.On 9th October,this coming Tuesday I am starting my yoga course,it will be the first session.

Gee.............I almost feel bad for saying I am fine...everyone else is down.... I hope you all win a million dollars today and can spend the rest of your lives focusing on whatever pleases you......

I’m trying to be helpful. I felt bad for this guy despite the fact he was also annoying me and holding me up. It seemed like I was doing his work as well as mine. I felt bad for him though since he seemed to be medically struggling. I helped him out and although it still didn’t work out for me I hope it at least made him feel better.

Am I sounding like a jerk?

I forgot to say I also have the common cold,came on yesterday,I hope it isn't flu,or going to develop into flu.I hope it goes as quickly as it came on!So that is why I am not coping so well also.

I think I'm good... I got out after 2 days of resting and in a way I feel calm at the very least. But it feels so weird that I can't seem to understand the other emotions of my alter like personalities.

I spent most of the morning *****ing to people on blah therapy how blah I feel (get it?. blah?)

and now to attack the forum with my daily posts...

and then eat my roast dinner

Hugs to everyone

Well, it is early in the day, but, so far, so good, LOL I am drinking my morning caffeinated nectar, doing a little web surfing and writing.