A lot of a lot

Everything just feels like a lot right now. It seems like everything is hitting me at once and I'm not really sure how to manage it. There's a lot going on at school, at work, and in my home life.

School isn't anything insane. There is a lot of assignments and tests coming up that I'm scared I won't complete or succeed in because of the other aspects of my life.

Work is one of the big areas I am struggling in. The dynamic of the family I watch has completely changed within 2 weeks. This has caused the kids I watch to turn into crazy people. It has also left a lot to be figured out. I try to help as much as possible but the whole situation is emotionally exhausting. I love the kids I watch and want what's best for them. This often causes me to overextend myself. I'm worried about how the kids will react to the change in dynamic and how it will affect their behavior. They are really good kids, I have worked hard over the last few years to get them to the point they are at. It also makes me feel selfish. Here the families whole world is changing and I'm worried about how it's going to affect me and my life. I'm worried about working more and how I'll cope with everything going on.

I am also in the process of moving. I have to be out of my place by the end of July and we have yet to find a house (Nor have I packed anything.) I'm scared it's not going to get done. It feels like I haven't done my part because I haven't called many places. My boyfriend has done basically all the work thus far and it feels like this is too much pressure for him. He is so helpful and nice to me and I kinda feel like a horrible girlfriend compared to him. I don't have the time or energy to do nice things in return. I don't spend enough time with my cat and by the time I get home at night, I don't have the energy to accomplish much of anything. It feels like I'm failing at all aspects of my life and I don't know how to dig myself out of this hole before I slip farther.

If I don't start working on things at school it will become a problem. I feel like I'm going to get to mid-July and be even more overwhelmed. I'm going to have a million assignments be working constantly and trying to move. I feel like a bad person because I don't really talk to anyone but I can't deal with the neediness my friends tend to have. I have like 2 friends and they ALWAYS need something. I don't even feel emotionally capable of listening to complain. I feel alone on top of everything. I don't know how to manage anything that's going on without feeling like it's me that's failing.