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#1
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My mother passed away this morning. This has been coming for two years, we were lucky she survived this long. My problem is that I feel very little beyond, "Well, that's that then, what is the next step?" My parents raised me to be hard, I guess it took. I think MOST people would be in tears right now. I am simply thinking about my next step.
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I go about my own business, and keep my mind on myself and my life. I expect the same courtesy from the rest of the world. ![]() |
![]() bpcyclist, guilloche, QuietTulip, scapegoat0001
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![]() bpcyclist
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#2
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@Medusax,
I am sorry for your loss. I have been talking about my grief over my soulmate's death in therapy for five months, and I have learned that there is no "normal" or "right" way to respond to the loss of a loved one. Many people do not cry at first. The fact that you are calm right now may help you to comfort others. If, after a while, you feel as if there are pent-up emotions you need to get out, there are all sorts of exercises for that kind of thing that you can do in therapy or alone. One that helped me was writing a letter to my soulmate about a month after he passed away. There are many others. Take care of yourself.
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Don't tell someone to get over it; help someone to get through it. |
![]() Medusax
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![]() guilloche
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#3
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I'm also sorry for your loss, Medusax. How was your relationship with your mom? Could it be that your brain is focusing on "what next?" as a way to help you avoid painful feelings?
*hugs* |
![]() Medusax
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#4
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I’m sorry for your loss. Everyone deals with grief in their own way and their own time. My best wishes to you.
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![]() Medusax
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#5
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I think you might be surprised at how many people in these situations have pretty much exactly the reaction you have had. It doesn't mean you loved her any less. It's not a contest.
My mother died in 2004 of a bad lung cancer. It had been a long illness and she was really suffering and, tbh, I was relieved when she died. Not for me, for her. She literally could not stop coughing. So, there weren't a lot of tears for me. But, of course, I loved her. She was my mom.
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When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them--Rodney Dangerfield |
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