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#1
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The title pretty much says it all.
I wish I didn't feel that way. Does anyone else feel like this? Has anyone dealt with it successfully? |
![]() Anonymous49105, Bill3, bpcyclist, bshaffer836, Buffy01, Fuzzybear, MickeyCheeky, thebigmermaid, TishaBuv, TunedOut
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![]() Bill3, Blknblu, Buffy01, LilyMop, MickeyCheeky, TunedOut
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#2
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I can feel needy but try not to show it out of fear of pushing someone away farther.
If you just tell the person you care and appreciate them, and don’t smother them, they will likely give you back some love.
__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
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#3
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Do you mean with a partner or significant other?
__________________
"I carried a watermelon?" President of the no F's given society. |
![]() Buffy01, MickeyCheeky
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![]() Buffy01, MickeyCheeky
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#4
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Quote:
I guess this is why I am posting it in emotions rather than relationships forum - although It's a cross over. I would like not to feel this way inside. I don't think I always have. |
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![]() Blknblu, MickeyCheeky
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#5
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I can sometimes feel that way with my husband but really it is across all friendships. It's worse with other friendships because I feel less secure in them than I do with my H.
I don't have many friends, I struggle in that area. |
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![]() Blknblu, MickeyCheeky
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#6
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I do not believe anything can be done about it except suppress not show. In my opinion it will always be there and is not something than can be talked, rationalised or therapied away.
That is just my opinion |
![]() MickeyCheeky
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![]() Blknblu, Discombobulated, MickeyCheeky
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#7
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I wonder too whether it is just an integral part of who I am.
There was a person I was feeling needy around and I confided in them. They were really cool about it and I was able to admit my vulnerabilities. This made me feel a lot easier and the neediness reduced hugely. I guess it was acknowledging feelings, but letting them go somehow. |
![]() MickeyCheeky
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#8
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Quote:
Do you end up pushing people away due to fear of vulnerability from being needy? |
![]() MickeyCheeky
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![]() Blknblu, MickeyCheeky
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#9
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I feel I might do sometimes.
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#10
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I think I do too sometimes. I think probably a lot of people do because it’s difficult to be vulnerable. |
![]() Discombobulated, MickeyCheeky, TunedOut
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![]() Discombobulated, MickeyCheeky
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#11
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I definitely feel needy and clingy as well!
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![]() Anonymous49105, Discombobulated, TunedOut
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#12
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Quote:
The thing for me is when I ask myself how would I react if someone admitted to me they felt needy and clingy I know I would be compassionate towards them. I notice how many people left me hugs here. They are compassionate towards me. It feels like we need self compassion here too. Maybe that is part of the answer. |
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#13
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Thanks MickeyCheeky, I feel you may be right about disclosure. I think sometimes disclosure can help as long as it's with the right person.
I am lucky in that I can tell my husband pretty much everything- when we were first dating he said I was clingy, I guess that stuck with me, but it was a long time ago. We have talked it through many times since and he is supportive. Other friends, some are closer than others, sometimes I feel I can discuss, sometimes not. Perhaps it is about trust, both trusting others and trusting myself to make the right decision who to trust. |
![]() Anonymous49105, MickeyCheeky, TunedOut
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![]() MickeyCheeky
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#14
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I try not to be clingy though I have been a few times--it was unusual for me. When it happened, it helped me feel a little more sensitive to the feelings of others. It hurt but sometimes the things that hurt most help us grow. I think I learned not to get too clingy with most because I am the oldest in my family. When you are the oldest of three--you are the "cat's meow" then the middle child takes your place.
![]() ![]() ![]() So in my case--I showed vulnerability, got hurt when they didn't feel as I did but they did me a huge favor--this person was both kind but also frank. They didn't feel the same way. I accept this. Acceptance is such a hard lesson but things don't always turn out as we wish or we might not get it. Maybe I was immature. Sure wish I had grown up at an earlier age--like before having children.. ![]() ![]() ![]() Last edited by TunedOut; Nov 04, 2019 at 04:18 PM. |
#15
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Yes I have felt needy and clingy. It occurred in my child and teen years. I never felt loved by my abusive parents. A male teacher was compassionate towards me when I injured myself in the classroom. He kept comforting me. I suddenly felt cared for. After school I asked if I could study in his classroom. He allowed it. I couldn't bring myself to talk about the abuse I was suffering. I spoke about other minor things. One day he told me it would be best if I see the school counsellor and basically said I couldn't stay after school. He was never inappropriate with me. It's possible he was trying to protect himself in case of suspicion at school. I felt so hurt and abandoned. After that I distanced and never allowed myself to feel vulnerable. It hurt more to be abandoned so I put a wall up.
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![]() Anonymous49105, Discombobulated, Fuzzybear, TunedOut
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#16
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Then its like all her attention should be on me, and I should know all her secrets, I hate this .. |
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#17
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I feel like this all the time I am currently working on this myself.
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#18
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hugs to all
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__________________
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![]() Buffy01, Discombobulated
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#19
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Oh boy feeling this way around a few people in my life right now......
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![]() TunedOut
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#20
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