Happiness... a personal journey

For the last many years, I've been focusing on feeling and being happy, with wherever I am, whatever I am doing, and with whatever circumstances I am facing.

Happiness is an indescribable state of being. I feel that with the ups and downs and challenges of life, that one cannot always truly *feel* joyful or feel feelings of happiness, but one can live life overall in a state of joy, despite the ups and downs, and that state of being can extend outwards to the world.

And this is what I have set out to achieve for myself -- is a state of being -- a state of joyful living that is persistent and which permeates all that I do and which rubs off on all whom I encounter in my life.

And I do live my life in a state of joy, regardless of any down moments I experience.

Whenever something negative occurs, I can step back and look at my life from an objective bird eye viewpoint, and I can say, well, hey, all is still pretty great in my book. I have a roof over my head, I have food and clothing and I have loved ones who care me about me. Not much is needed in order to truly be happy.

And I learned this long ago while living abroad in a 3rd world country - Nepal. I lived there for 3 months, I learned the language and I lived with an impoverished family who took me into their home. It was the most eye-opening, transformative experience of my entire life.

My Nepali family and the Nepali culture taught me the art of happiness and the art of living joyfully. My family was very poor and had very little. And they were happy -- probably the happiest people I have ever known in my entire life. That says A LOT.

I am so grateful for having had that experience.

I am grateful for all my life experiences - the good, the bad and the ugly. Because I wouldn't be who I am today without those experiences.

So, I am happy...... I am jobless, but I am happy, despite this fact. Happiness is a journey as they say, and not a destination.

Loved this... Thank you

Aw, thank YOU!

You sound happier since you left your job. I’m glad to hear it. Is it a weight off your shoulders?

I’m learning that I can carry grief and heartbreak and happiness and joy all at the same time. I didn’t think it was possible but I’m learning that it is.

I am!!!!!! HUGE weight off my shoulders!!!

And yes.... I agree with you. It's possible to carry all those emotions and hold them simultaneously.

Very uplifting! Thanks

Your post makes me smile and made me realize that happiness can be had if we just learn to appreciate life. It’s a state of mind and has nothing to do with material things. Thank you so much for this!

You got it!!

I had some disappointments occur from my last job that brought down my spirits. I am trying to alleviate this feeling I have. People will disappoint you. But it's our expectations of others that creates this disappointment.

In reality, we cannot expect others to behave as we would, and people will always disappoint and will always act as we don't expect them to.

This is why it's so important to rely on ONESELF for inner happiness.

I will not allow this recent disappointment to kill my inner joy or my happiness today. Some people DO follow through, and some people DO care. So I will focus on those people and on those feelings instead.

Native Joy:

Awesome. I needed to hear this. Thanks!

Thanks for sharing!!

Hugs!

“In reality, we cannot expect others to behave as we would, and people will always disappoint and will always act as we don't expect them to.”

^This has been a huge issue for me and my trigger. It’s the ‘will act as we don’t expect them to’ that really dumbfounds me and sends me reeling.

People usually do act as I expect them to, based on societal norms and my personal history with them. When they act out of left field, my mind obsesses sometimes over why they acted the way they did. I do figure it out though. It’s simply that they really didn’t care for me. Acceptance is much easier now that I understand that.

I’m appreciating the moments where I just do feel simple happiness and will keep trying to prolong that nice feeling. Hopefully, it will build. I will avoid my known triggers that cause great unhappiness. Neutral emotions are pleasant, too.

I get triggered too by this. I was REALLY upset and rocked when two former colleagues did not reply to my request for a recommendation after being laid off and after working closely with each of them and helping each of them in different ways. I thought, wow, lend a hand and the favor isn't returned -- how awful.

It wasn't until I wrote a note to HR, explaining how disappointed I was in these two people, that my recommendations were immediately written and posted on my LinkedIn profile. She definitely guilted them and said something. And I'm grateful for that!

But yeah, when people act and behave out of left field in a way that leaves me feeling deflated, used, or stepped on, it's an awful feeling. I put my heart and soul into my work at my last job. And I had saved one of these individuals from total failure with a client.

Not everyone has the same heart as you/me. Not everyone is kind or gives back. Some people are simply just takers and are selfishly driven.

I've had to learn the hard way this most valuable lesson.

Now I will try to expect less.

But that doesn't mean that we have to ACCEPT less than what we deserve. We can choose to walk away from people and situations that disappoint us or leave us feeling deflated. We can CHOOSE with whom we wish to associate, be friends with and spend time with. We don't HAVE to put up with bad behavior. We can walk away. Another valuable lesson I've learned, and one that is CRITICAL for happiness.

Whatever their reasons were for not giving you the recommendation you asked of them, I’m glad they finally did, no matter how it was gotten out of them as it benefits you.

I agree, we don’t have to take it. Sometimes walking away is easy, but sometimes it’s so difficult. It’s not impossible. Feeling hopeful.

YES.... thank you!!! I am MOST grateful for their positive endorsements!!!!! They were fantastic reviews, so I am ecstatic about that.

I know that walking away can be very difficult, and no, it's not impossible.