[Have Hope]

Life is hellacious right now. I am not in a good place and have not been in a very long time.

I am feeling like total crap about myself, I was rejected for three jobs in a row, my current job has gone from bad to worse, I am struggling at work to boot, and I am reacting poorly to my new biotch of a boss.

And the bottom line is: I am just not feeling good about life these days. I want to crawl into a hole and disappear. I wish I could just feel good for once and feel Ok, but I don't.

My anxiety over work eats at me day after day, even during the weekends. I try to shut it off, but that doesn't help. It just delays the inevitable which is thinking about all the problems there.

My last boss was far better than this new one, I've determined. At least he was helpful and didn't interfere. When he did need to act like a boss, he was generally a good dude about things.

There was only one time where he came down on me hard in a phone call, and I chalk that up to his own stresses, which I learned about later. It turns out that they gave him the option to either get ***** done, or they would have to part ways. He was allowing his work to pile up on him, without knocking much off his list.

But at least he was far more likable and was generally very nice to us. My new boss is not likable and is throwing her weight around within one week, admonishing a couple of us by email and cc'ing the VP, myself included.

Late Friday afternoon, she asked my entire team of 8 people on instant messenger if we have any fun weekend plans - not ONE single person on the team responded, so I felt I had to reply and I did.

It says a LOT that not one team member replied to her. I think she's rubbed everyone the wrong way so far - that's what I am gathering, at least. A colleague told me she had chewed him out earlier in the day. This is her first week of work.

I had two bad managers before her in this same company. I am beyond frustrated that I cannot seem to have a good manager above me or receive a job offer, despite my best attempts. Hence, a large part of why I am so down on myself. I either suck at interviewing lately, or the competition is just insanely fierce right now.

On top of all that, my husband injured his back recently (herniated disk) and his pain got far worse this morning because he overdid it yesterday with too much activity. I told him not to and to be careful, but he wouldn't listen to me. So now he's paying for it and is in even worse pain. He's been laid up for a week now and it's been misery. We spent four hours in the emergency room last weekend, the day after 9/11, the day he lost his brother in the twin towers. What a miserable weekend it was. And now here I am, still in misery.

It's been one bad thing after another in my life, and I cannot seem to catch a break.

This is a very long-winded vent, but any positive words of support and comfort would be extremely helpful right now. I feel SO alone with all of this. I do have a therapist, but I really need therapy every single day to get by right now.

[Yaowen]

Dear Have Hope,

I am so very, very sorry you are suffering this miserable and interminable ordeal. Having a bad boss can make all of life miserable. Sadly, I have had experience with this. Wish I knew what to say that would help!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by Yaowen

Dear Have Hope,

I am so very, very sorry you are suffering this miserable and interminable ordeal. Having a bad boss can make all of life miserable. Sadly, I have had experience with this. Wish I knew what to say that would help!

Sincerely yours, Yao Wen

Thank you @Yaowen! Your reply and your empathy is plenty. Thank you so much for saying this.

[MickeyCheeky]

So Sorry for your Losses and that things are being so hard also! Please Do not give up! Hugs. i agree with the wise and wonderful Yaowen about being Sorry that you have to put up with this at all. Unfortunately sometimes work can be hard also much more than it should be. Let us Hope things will improve really soon for you and your husband and that perhaps you will be able to find another job. Or at least for things to improve at work obviously. m. Please do continue to try your best like i'm sure you're already wonderfully doing. Do try to make yourself feel heard when possible. Be Kind. You matter. Love. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Have Hope, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

So Sorry for your Losses and that things are being so hard also! Please Do not give up! Hugs. i agree with the wise and wonderful Yaowen about being Sorry that you have to put up with this at all. Unfortunately sometimes work can be hard also much more than it should be. Let us Hope things will improve really soon for you and your husband and that perhaps you will be able to find another job. Or at least for things to improve at work obviously. m. Please do continue to try your best like i'm sure you're already wonderfully doing. Do try to make yourself feel heard when possible. Be Kind. You matter. Love. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Have Hope, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

Thanks, @MickeyCheeky!

[RoxanneToto]

This sounds so horrible, I wish I knew what to suggest. I can sympathise to a degree, I’ve had a few terrible bosses in my time!

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by RoxanneToto

This sounds so horrible, I wish I knew what to suggest. I can sympathise to a degree, I’ve had a few terrible bosses in my time!

@RoxanneToto, thank you. Your reply and sympathies help, even if you can't suggest anything. Just receiving caring replies helps enormously right now. I don't know if anyone can suggest a solution for me, other than to continue looking for a new job. But that's exhausting, and the rejections take a toll on your self esteem. Big SIGH.

Anyways, thanks so much.

[RoxanneToto]

It is indeed exhausting, but I believe you can get there in the meantime take as good care of yourself as you can.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by RoxanneToto

It is indeed exhausting, but I believe you can get there in the meantime take as good care of yourself as you can.

Thank you.... and thanks for the encouragement! I need to hear that in order to gear up for more applications in my near future.

Today I am taking a much needed mental health day.

[Bill3]

I'm sorry.

Today I am taking a much needed mental health day.

Sounds good! I wish you more smiles!

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by Bill3

I'm sorry.


Sounds good! I wish you more smiles!

Thanks so much @Bill3!

[Have Hope]

I woke up this morning with sooo much anxiety about work. I know I am going to be chewed out by my new boss in our meeting today. One of my client's calls from their website went down by 75% this month so far, and I have to resolve it somehow. My anxiety level is through the roof. I wish I could call in sick, but I can't. I have important meetings today that I must attend.

This is sooo hard right now. I don't know how to cope with all of this.

[hvert]

I hope you get through your meetings today and that things turn around and start heading in the right direction soon.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by hvert

I hope you get through your meetings today and that things turn around and start heading in the right direction soon.

Thank you @hvert. I need the encouragement and positivity.

[Bill3]

Hang in there Have Hope! Remember that you are really good at what you do. 🙂

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by Bill3

Hang in there Have Hope! Remember that you are really good at what you do. 🙂

Awww, thanks @Bill3!

Truth is, I used to think I was really good at it until just recently. I feel very challenged by my work lately, which has made me question my skills and value. Plus, being rejected for three jobs in a row makes me wonder what I am missing, ya know?