Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Feb 14, 2022, 05:51 AM
joetouch joetouch is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2022
Location: california
Posts: 2
We had just watched the superbowl with my wife, my brother-in-law and his girlfriend. his daughters and my two sons ages 17, 15, 2 and three were in the house. We started arguing about the half time show and what made me so angry was that my brother-in-law girlfriend had an opinion that I didn't agree with and she would not let me complete a single counter thought.
Possible trigger:
when I was driving alone, I was expressing my feelings out loud, essentially going off on her without her there. anyways, I return and as soon as I walk in, she immediately starts talking again and I just go off on her, saying things like, do you know where you are, youre in my house, shut the **** up and respect me." I cannot believe I said things like that and I know better. my wife even told me before I blew up to drop it. I wish I listened,

I welcome all thoughts and suggestions.

Thank you for your time.
J

Last edited by bluekoi; Feb 14, 2022 at 12:32 PM. Reason: Add trigger icon.
Hugs from:
Buffy01, Yaowen
Thanks for this!
Buffy01

advertisement
  #2  
Old Feb 14, 2022, 02:16 PM
Yaowen's Avatar
Yaowen Yaowen is offline
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since: Jan 2020
Location: USA
Posts: 3,770
Sorry that happened to you. Something similar happened to me before. Wish I knew what to say to help.
  #3  
Old Feb 18, 2022, 05:01 PM
Aviza's Avatar
Aviza Aviza is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Jan 2013
Location: Midwest
Posts: 2,456
Sorry that happened maybe apologize.
__________________
Son: 14, 12/15/2009 R.I.P.
Daughter: 20
Diagnosis: Bipolar with Psychosis. Latuda 100 mgs.
  #4  
Old Feb 18, 2022, 10:48 PM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,967
How often does something like this happen?
  #5  
Old Feb 21, 2022, 10:38 PM
joetouch joetouch is offline
New Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2022
Location: california
Posts: 2
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bill3 View Post
How often does something like this happen?
Honestly, with other people, almost never bit with loved ones where passion is involved probably monthly.
Thanks for this!
Bill3
  #6  
Old Feb 22, 2022, 11:41 AM
Bill3 Bill3 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Mar 2009
Location: USA
Posts: 10,967
What would you think of attending an anger management program or seeing a therapist for help with anger management?
  #7  
Old Feb 22, 2022, 06:18 PM
eskielover's Avatar
eskielover eskielover is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Oct 2004
Location: Kentucky, USA
Posts: 25,085
Anger issues & liquor NEVER mix well to start with. Takes away the ability to be mindful about what you say & how you act.
__________________


Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this.
Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018
Thanks for this!
Bill3, Open Eyes, Yours_Truly
  #8  
Old Mar 03, 2022, 06:08 AM
moodyblue83 moodyblue83 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Aug 2021
Location: USA
Posts: 261
This may surprise you but I’m glad you got your true feelings out.
Although booze and emotions don’t mix , it gave you the courage to
be honest ! It’s to the point now in our society where you can’t say a word
unless it’s “politically correct”. BTW : The Super Bowl halftime show was garbage
and I would get my kids out of the room immediately. That’s why I don’t even
want to watch nothing but highlights when it comes to professional sports.
Apologize if you feel you need too but just remember. Boozed up or not ,
you’ll never be able to have an even keel discussion with certain people.
__________________
Trying to Live in the Moment
  #9  
Old Mar 08, 2022, 01:50 PM
ArmorPlate108's Avatar
ArmorPlate108 ArmorPlate108 is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Mar 2022
Location: In the west
Posts: 479
Well, the good news is that you take responsibility for your part in it. There there are always situations where emotions can get out of control and nobody seems to be able to back down. It happens to everyone and even when it's something that seems dumb it's probably not just that one thing, kwim?

Since you asked for suggestions, the way I usually look at things like that postmortem is to analyze whether I seemed to be the one baiting the other person or whether they were baiting me more. It doesn't really matter who's pushing the argument to greater heights but it can be helpful to analyze your part in it for future reference. If you didn't like it and you can figure out what went wrong you can make sure it doesn't happen again. Did you feel like arguing or did you get sucked into it? It can also give you a basis to figure out if you need to be the one to apologize.
Thanks for this!
Bill3, Yours_Truly
  #10  
Old Apr 10, 2022, 07:57 PM
Fuzzybear's Avatar
Fuzzybear Fuzzybear is offline
Wisest Elder Ever
 
Member Since: Nov 2002
Location: Cave.
Posts: 96,637
Quote:
Originally Posted by ArmorPlate108 View Post
Well, the good news is that you take responsibility for your part in it. There there are always situations where emotions can get out of control and nobody seems to be able to back down. It happens to everyone and even when it's something that seems dumb it's probably not just that one thing, kwim?

Since you asked for suggestions, the way I usually look at things like that postmortem is to analyze whether I seemed to be the one baiting the other person or whether they were baiting me more. It doesn't really matter who's pushing the argument to greater heights but it can be helpful to analyze your part in it for future reference. If you didn't like it and you can figure out what went wrong you can make sure it doesn't happen again. Did you feel like arguing or did you get sucked into it? It can also give you a basis to figure out if you need to be the one to apologize.
Good post, I agree with this
__________________
Hugs from:
Bill3
  #11  
Old Apr 11, 2022, 06:34 AM
Sohappy Sohappy is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Dec 2018
Location: Canada
Posts: 131
Perhaps you can go on YouTube and search for "anger triggers" on how to avoid them and what causes them. There may be some helpful discussion on it or not by counselors and life coaches.
  #12  
Old Apr 12, 2022, 06:33 PM
Buffy01's Avatar
Buffy01 Buffy01 is offline
Legendary
 
Member Since: Oct 2017
Location: USA
Posts: 10,831
Quote:
Originally Posted by joetouch View Post
We had just watched the superbowl with my wife, my brother-in-law and his girlfriend. his daughters and my two sons ages 17, 15, 2 and three were in the house. We started arguing about the half time show and what made me so angry was that my brother-in-law girlfriend had an opinion that I didn't agree with and she would not let me complete a single counter thought.
Possible trigger:
when I was driving alone, I was expressing my feelings out loud, essentially going off on her without her there. anyways, I return and as soon as I walk in, she immediately starts talking again and I just go off on her, saying things like, do you know where you are, youre in my house, shut the **** up and respect me." I cannot believe I said things like that and I know better. my wife even told me before I blew up to drop it. I wish I listened,

I welcome all thoughts and suggestions.

Thank you for your time.
J
Sometimes we just need to vent out our anger. The girlfriend should have been a little nicer as well as respected your boundaries. Your brother in law she had told his girlfriend to just cool it not everyone has to agree with her and can still have fun.
__________________
Everyone can do magic - Cassie Nightgale the good witch.

Dear Diary today will be different today I can smile it will be genuine because today is the day I get to live.

This life will be good and beautiful, but not without heartbreak.

In death come peace. But pain is the cost of living.

Like love, it's how we know we're alive.

And life goes on.

That my life weird, messy, complicated, sad, wonderful, amazing, and above all epic and I owe all to Stephen. - Eleanor Gilbert Vampire Diaries
Thanks for this!
Bill3
  #13  
Old Apr 13, 2022, 01:19 AM
SubhashBhat SubhashBhat is offline
Account Suspended
 
Member Since: Apr 2022
Location: chandigarh
Posts: 17
Sometimes we need to change the way of taking things out. Imo, anger is a very powerful emotion and energy, which should be used very carefully. It can either make you fall apart or will make you stronger. The choice is always ours. And we can’t blame someone for our behaviour.
  #14  
Old Apr 15, 2022, 01:25 AM
ChanderKamath ChanderKamath is offline
Account Suspended
 
Member Since: Apr 2022
Location: chandigarh
Posts: 25
Anger issues can’t be solved with drinking. Drinking can actually take over the mind and can lead to make decisions recklessly.
Reply
Views: 1023

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 03:24 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.