how does someone know if their self esteem level is right or not?

like whether they know if its too high or too low or accurate?

i mean for example i am certain my self esteem is accurate cause i'm a dirtbag and know it and understand its what i am

i was going to see about one day going to the chat thing to ask this question but have no idea when my work schedule will allow me to go into chat for the qoestion and answer things

idk

maybe this question not allowed willowtigger get yelled at

[Yaowen]

I am not an expert on that kind of question but I think [and it is only my own personal fallible opinion] that value, as in the value of a person, forms a continuum or range.

At one end of that range are people who have done really great things for people and the human race.

At the other end are people like, say, Hitler, Stalin and people who have caused the destruction of tens of millions of human beings through campaigns of genocide or forced starvation of populations.

Now I am not sure what you mean by "dirt bag," since it is a pejorative adjective.

I do not think that you have caused the destruction of tens of millions of men, women and children . . . or millions . . . or hundreds of thousands . . . or tens of thousands . . . or thousands . . . or hundreds . . . so I don't see how you could merit a pejorative label like that one.

Sometimes a person is good at some things but not so good at others or even poor in those areas of life.

There was a man named Oskar Schindler who kind of stumbled through life in a series of failures: failures in his personal life, in his professional life, in his moral life and so on.

But at one point in his life he did something pretty amazing by becoming a Holocaust rescuer. And that really redefined him as a human being.
And today is he is seen as one of the world's greatest heroes and human beings.

Of course, at one time, Oscar Schindler might have been called by a pejorative label similar to the English expression "dirt bag." But he recreated himself. Perhaps he used such a label to describe himself?

But often heroism is not so dramatic or heralded.

I know a homeless woman who lives day to day by begging. She is beset by terrible mental illness. But she has become known for always giving some of her money to various charities.

She often goes into gas stations and convenience stores for food and such and always puts some money into boxes for various charities: UNICEF, the March of Dimes, the Red Cross, St. Jude's Children's Hospital and so on.

It is her way of doing a little something to make the world a little bit of a better place for those less fortunate than herself.

So I think it is always possible for a person to do something great or to try to redraw the portrait of themselves.

Not sure what I have written will be helpful to you. My English is not that great and so perhaps I have misunderstood your words.

I do hope that others here, . . . others with more knowledge, insight, experience and wisdom will see your post and your question and respond with more helpful words than my poor words. I wish you only the best!

[Sohappy]

Originally Posted by willowtigger

how does someone know if their self esteem level is right or not?

like whether they know if its too high or too low or accurate?

i mean for example i am certain my self esteem is accurate cause i'm a dirtbag and know it and understand its what i am

i was going to see about one day going to the chat thing to ask this question but have no idea when my work schedule will allow me to go into chat for the qoestion and answer things

idk

maybe this question not allowed willowtigger get yelled at

Willowtigger, hugs. I am sorry you feel that way.

Why would you call yourself that? Is it really an accurate fair description? Or someone else's opinion?

Where is all this coming from? What evidence do you have to call yourself that?

Are they behaviors that you do that you are not pleased about? Can they be modified and molded to increase your self esteem?

Have you discussed them with a therapist or counselor?

Idk what a perjury adjective is

I stupid

It's stuff that three in my head says, he been living in my head sinceloafs of traumas in 2012 loads of stuff I can't remember unless I get a flash memory


Cause I a bad person

[Sohappy]

I am sorry willowtigger. I wish you could tell Three, he doesn't get to decide that for you and his opinions don't matter. But I realize that it isn't quite as simple as that.

If Three is constantly putting you down and bringing up flashbacks from the past, then he is a bully and he is contributing to your low self esteem and trying undermining any attempts at wellness and self recovery.

He knows the world will be a better place if I wasn't in it

three willowtigger understands that she's a scummy piece of crap

[Bill3]

I'm really sorry to hear you speak to yourself so harshly. It sounds like you are really hurting a lot right now.

i dreamed of her a couple of nights ago, my four legged angel girl

i truly dont think i'll recover and i dont deserve to heal either

i kept telling her (in the dream) to wake up but she never did

my angel sweetpea Ebony

cancers in 3 places (that number again) and she kept doing fits


March 2018 was when i held her at the end, as much as possible on the vet table

[Bill3]

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Originally Posted by willowtigger

Idk what a perjury adjective is

I stupid

if it helps, I only just learned a few months ago that a cat goes meow. I mean, at my age, that's something I should have known as a kid- like one of the first things I learned at school

but I didn't really have much schooling, or much childhood, very sheltered life

these days someone can say to me oh you're an idiot, and I'm like yeah, yeah, I know

He calls me a murders

[Bill3]

He is wrong.

Originally Posted by Bill3

He is wrong.

He might be right though cause I could of saved her if the vet had done another x-ray when she started having troubles breathing again, instead the vet started doing different medication doses 💔

Vet only did the x-ray when angel Ebony stopped fighting and her health suddenly went downhill again, she started having the fits around that time as well

I can never forgive myself

My self esteem is likely accurate, a complete scummy turdbag

[Sohappy]

I hate that you feel that way, Tiggerwillow.

If you accept that as the truth, then there is little anyone can say or do. I am sure it makes everyone who care for you very sad.

I know you don't like yourself and think you are not worthy of love and support.

Think of it another way. Is there anyone in your life who deserves love and support? Is there anyone you look forward to see and why?

[Bill3]

I've seen a lot of lovely and helpful comments that you have made on other threads. 🙂

[Fuzzybear]