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#1
Sep 13, 2022, 07:10 AM
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There's far too much going on and I feel depressed about all of it.
They're not moving me up at work, even though I've asked for this multiple times. My husband has been initiating fights with me lately - 3 in the last month, and I am now considering a divorce if he insults me just one more time. Insults and hurtful comments have been thrown my way during these fights and I am tired of it. Tired of being gaslighted and of dealing with the toxic nature of these fights. We had separated for 6 months previously because he had been abusive - and I am afraid that the abusive behaviors are still present, despite his therapy. I don't think he's taking therapy very seriously and I don't think he's TRULY working on himself. So, a divorce may be pending and I am depressed about that. My dad's memorial service is happening later this month and it's all my family can think about and talk about. My dad died in June - and that comes with it's own set of issues and sadness. And today, I just feel sad and very burdened by all of it. Like I cannot carry all of this within me at the same time. It's too much to bare at once. How do you cope when there's so many issues at play at the same time? 
__________________
"Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
 Discombobulated, unaluna
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#2
Sep 13, 2022, 10:10 AM
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So sorry you're going through all this and you are hurting...
I cope by coming on here, chatting, writing to other people and perhaps most pointedly: writing... period. Writing it all down and getting it off my chest. I don't necessarily reread it... but I get it out: the fear, the anger, the sadness. I also do guided meditations on Insight Timer which helps my anxiety. As for the anger , depression and what feels out of control... I make short daily to-do lists that include something that moves me forward in a positive way... could be making a doctor's appointment, or consulting a lawyer to see my options for something... could be thinking about a mid-to-longer term goal and listing steps to achieve it... Also, for the anger (and for my lymph system), I've started jumping on a 'rebounder' trampoline. I have 2 ropes on either side so I can hold on to them for stability... that has been helping me cope. I try to learn new skills such as from the book The Gentle art of Verbal Self-Defense... Hope some of what I've said helps! Sending you good vibes and keep posting... |
| Discombobulated, unaluna
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 Have Hope, unaluna
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#3
Sep 14, 2022, 05:53 AM
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Thank you @TheGal.
 Those are all great suggestions. Right now, it's hard to even get up and go to work each morning though. It's a chore. I do write sometimes and I call my friends and family sometimes. That can help. I am also working on my goal to lose weight, which is very slow going and frustrating. I'm just not in a good place right now and everything feels really really hard. Getting up to go to work is very hard each day. And, I know this sounds terrible, but I need for my dad's service to be over. It has been hanging over us since June and it's all we talk about. It keeps his death very much alive and present all the time. I need to be able to move on and past this. For myself.
__________________
"Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes Last edited by Have Hope; Sep 14, 2022 at 06:18 AM. |
| Starlingflock
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#4
Sep 14, 2022, 06:37 AM
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Hugs back at you... @Have Hope
I, too, would feel the need to have the service ... this is a major life event... You're dealing with so much... my heart goes out to you... Be gentle with yourself... Getting to work right now might be all you can do .. for the moment... and that's okay. It's a lot to get to work with everything you're dealing with... Hope you are getting your vitamins and sleep... Sometimes we have to retreat to gather our strength... Steady on and gently gently ... self-love and compassion... |
| Discombobulated, Have Hope
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#5
Sep 15, 2022, 06:23 AM
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Quote:
__________________
"Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination" ~4 Non Blondes |
| TheGal
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| TheGal
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This is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.|
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