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#1
May 21, 2009, 10:00 PM
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my little bubble is breaking apart.
I feel like I'm falling apart , melting and freezing on the outside all at once... the hard shell is starting to come back on already. That shell that I've FINALLY been shrugging off so that I can live and not hurt so much. I was fully expecting to remain in this area this summer... now I am forced to return home, put on the shell before I'm ready... I don't know if I can return to school next semester and if I can't it'll be from now until January *which will break me for sure, if the summer doesn't*. I feel like I can't bear to keep phone contact up with my bf while we're apart but at the same time how can I not? I just don't know what to do I feel so helpless right now... like all the work I've done over that past 6 months is falling around me and crashing into a gazzilion pieces 
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 Yesterday I was so clever, so I want to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. |
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#2
May 22, 2009, 12:30 AM
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Low on words tonight. Just remember we are here for you.
 
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Lea 
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 turquoisesea
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#3
May 22, 2009, 12:34 AM
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I'm sorry you're going through a difficult time. I don't really have any advice except to just hang in there and I can offer some hugs:
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~ (Webber) Erik is my daddy ~ ~ Manda86 is my sister ~ ~ Pupp is my twinny!  ~ |
| turquoisesea
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#4
May 22, 2009, 03:33 AM
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__________________
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| turquoisesea
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#5
May 22, 2009, 07:06 AM
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__________________
Rebecca "If you're going through hell -- keep going." - Winston Churchill It's better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of somebody else's life with perfection. - Elizabeth Gilbert Bring on the wonder, we got it all wrong, we pushed you down deep in our souls, so hang on. Bring on the wonder, bring on the song, I pushed you down deep in my soul for too long. - Susan Enan http://igetupagain.wordpress.com/ |
| turquoisesea
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#6
May 22, 2009, 09:06 PM
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*hugs everyone*
It's just... that feeling again, the sadness that I know won't go away with a good cry, or with a hug, or a soft touch. At home, I don't think I can escape it. I'm scared, i'm hurt and lost...
__________________
Yesterday I was so clever, so I want to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. |
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#7
May 23, 2009, 10:02 AM
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((((((((((((turquoisesea)))))))))))))
Just hang on for dear life turquoisesea. You can get through this. I just know you can. Keep posting. i care... we care 
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I love your faults because they are part of you and I love you. --my BFF [center][b][color=#92d050][font=Verdana] |
| turquoisesea
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#8
May 23, 2009, 02:15 PM
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The hard work that you have done in an attempt to repair your life will yield positive results for your future. The days to come can be a CLEAN SLATE, regardless of the scars that you bring with you from the past.
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The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The End The Beginning 
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| turquoisesea
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#9
May 24, 2009, 12:17 AM
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Thanks everyone... I do have to realize I need to try to put as positive a spin on this as I can. But I feel myself slipping just at the THOUGHT of being home, at the thought of being apart from my bf, so it's hard.
If anyone has any ideas how to deal with GUILT TRIPS... that would be great. I'll be facing so many of them and that's currently the thing I can't escape that gets me down. I'm old enough there's a lot of other things my parents can't do to me anymore... but my mom lays some HORRIBLE guilt trips to the point that I believe them.
__________________
Yesterday I was so clever, so I want to change the world. Today I am wise, so I am changing myself. |
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