[perhapsbelligerent]

you know, im actually making ends meet.

it's kinda of scary.

it was just a few years ago i was literally planning to overdose myself because i didnt think i could handle it all. my family was dying, i realized it was just going to be me taking care of me and i didnt think i could do it. I thought i was going to be living under a bridge, starving to death.

i was so full of fear.

now im looking back and i cant really believe i made it. I'm still broke, im still poor... but dear god im pulling it off.

i actually got a full fridge of food today!

i get so down on myself for not being where i want to be, but when i sit back and think of where i was... i really dont understand why i beat myself up so much. i probably will forget this in a week or two, and go back to whinning but how pathetic i am, but today i realized im getting better.

maybe there is hope for a better life down the road.

[tarabug922]

That's so great that you can see the positive in things. You are an amazing success. I wanted to second the positive ring in your post.

Love and Hugs,
Tara

[Beholden]

That is so good to read -there is hope in this life after all.

And you've 'caught ' it.

I've beendown that road, down on myself because of 'where I am'. And where I want to be.

My T one time told me that I was right where I was supposed to be. I try to remind myself of that sometimes.

A fridge full of food? You live where? He he he he

[Naturefreak]

I have the same fear . The only one in my life right now is my Dad who has a
heart condition , diabetes , depression from loss of his wife . His second wife
that is . His first wife , my mother , died of cancer and so did his second wife.
I just fear I will not have the strength to continue on or the finances to keep
up the house payments. I am not stable enough or at least think I'm not to
be able to handle his passing . But it will happen . That's a definite.
I'll just have to take it one day at a time and hope for the best .