tired

I'm feeling depressed and it is making it hard for me to get my homework done. I have so much to do and got so little done this weekend. I feel like it is never going to be done. All I could do this afternoon was sleep. I feel so weighed down. I don't care about it all and that hurts. I feel like I'm ruining all my dreams. I can't sleep through classes. I don't want to go through this all again.

I never knew it was going to be so hard moving and living alone. I can go days without talking to people when I don't have class. I feel so alone as I don't have any friends here. None of my other friends ever call me. Even when I call them. I feel alone. All I have are acquaintances here. No one to do anything with. I feel worthless. I just want to be able to be happy without having to work so hard at it all the time.

I'm sorry life is so hard right now.

I'm not much help right now, but know that I care.

Googley I've been exactly where you are and it can be so miserable. I lived mostly alone for about 19 years, few friends and those who were were not really nice or cared too much. If I hadn't called them I could have died alone and they'd never even checked to see if I was still around. In the end I dumped them too. My cat kept me in touch with reality and did until she passed away in 2007, about 6 months after I met my wife to be at the time. Sometimes I wonder if there was some karmic thing going on that she knew I'd be mostly ok if she left at that time. I still really miss her every day. Her name was Brie and I called her Briester sometimes, hence my screename.

You're not alone in this but you can pull through no matter how dark it may get. The one thing when you live alone is you realize how much you can actually do for yourself. This alone helps.

I hope you can have a good day and take it one moment at a time.

Best wishes.

((((((((((((((( googley ))))))))))))))))

I think you are fantastic you know why? Because you DID make that move to live alone, something so many would love to do but don't have the strength like you did ... It's easy to feel down and go to sleep and I'm sure you've heard this before but when you feel like that take a walk for 30 mins ... this will stop you from feeling sluggish and may inspire you to do something other than sleep. Could you join a local club and do something you like? This way you will fill up some 'lonely' time and meet new people too with the same interests. It could be yoga or poetry or anything ... art? Judo? Something you like doing or would like to do ....

So sorry you are feeling down. It's a horrible place to be but you will feel better, sending hugs if that's ok, Ophelia xxx

(((((((((((googley)))))))))))

I have no words of wisdom for you.

I just wanted you to know that I can relate to your lonliness. I also have no irl friends and haven't for over a year. It would be nice to have someone to do things with or to just hang out.

I'm sorry things are so hard for you right now. Please keep hanging in there. Put one foot in front of the other and just show up. Something good just may come along.

((((Googly)))) I here you and resonate. It is not easy getting the energy up that relationships need. I have had friends that I simply have been too exhausted to keep writing, relatives whose birthdays I am too scattered to remember, and I can see why people preferr to keep contact with those who give more for the effort made. The real friends have been those who have realized what was up and are still there. courses are a good idea, but you might want to take one that allows the possibility to continue for more then a a semester. It can take a bit to get to know people.