This site cannot deal with reality

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No, I do not feel I carry any power, we are not "police", ha!ha!

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On that, I have to disagree with you. What one group of people perceives as fair and equitable application of Psych Central policies, another group of people may perceive as biased and judgmental enforcement of personal preferences that selectively cite policies to support the personal opinion.

It is well within the policies for mods to censor threads for any reason that their judgment tells them to do so. It is well within the policies for such decisions to be nontransparent, secret, unexplained.

It should not be startling, however, when members and visitors question judgments that are not explained. During the 1970s, cities that experienced demonstrations and riots often started offices of Rumor Control. These offices were intended to offer the truth about what was going on, so that twisted rumors didn't stir up rioting. Today, the wisdom about Crisis Management that is that it is best to get the truth out quickly -- truth about the situation and how it is being contained officially -- so that rumors don't breed.

The site is not a democracy, not does it need to be. To that extent, I support the position that if I, or anyone, doesn't like life around here, get another life or site that I do like.

Yet, we live in a democracy with increasing, not decreasing transparency. So questioning decisions that may seem inexplicable to some of us, disagreeable to others, unwarranted to another contingent, are predictable responses. Just as it is predictable that another group will be strong supporters of the decision.

This seems a good place to insert a disclaimer that this post is not intended to hurt anyone, nor the Forums, but is in the spirit of conversation that is being carried on, with people expressing various positions that are not agreed upon by everyone.

To sum up my position: Mods have authority, whether or not individual mods want to acknowledge it. Mods decisions are made in a quasi-public forum. It is to be expected that such decisions will be perceived differently by different people and that discussion will result. With authority comes the possibility of abuse, and public discussion is likely to consider, in any given instance, whether unfairness, poor judgment, etc., has occurred.

It's the nature of the beast, and I don't see how disagreement might ever be eliminated, nor that it would be desirable to do so. I also believe that even the illusion of transparency goes a long way to quiet people.

So it goes.

No one ever said they were psychologists here, just volunteers. We have even had statements posted, stating that none of us claim to be psychologists, nor is this site a substitute for professional mental health issues.
We urge people that are in need of professional help and/or suicidal to contact a mental health professional or dial 911.
Now, can we all stop the "pop" shots at each other ?

Thanks, hope that was of some help with your post.

Please take care,

DE

((((((((((( to all )))))))))))))

thank you wants2fly. your post makes much sense.and so i have been quieted.

Though, you may not want to believe or haven't been made aware, mods ONLY follow what the website master, Doc John, requests us to do, anyone having a problem with that, I strongly suggest they contact him, and have him explain.
We also have a section for all, explaining or displaying guidelines for this site, in life there has to be some guidelines, boundaries, rules, and laws, doesn't always mean we as citizens always like them, but then there is importance to them, keep some order to prevent chaos.
Sorry for my rambling, hope it makes some sense to you.
Please take care now,

DE


(((((((((( Wants )))))))))))

i've been following this thread.

yes, ppl feel like doodoo. right now i'm standing in a huge pile of it and feel the nasty heat from it. even though, i RESPECT the basis of this community and have agreed to follow the guidelines set forth. it's just that simple.

are there things i need to say that shouldn't be said here according to the guidelines??? absolutely!!!! i say them. i say them other than in the public forum...period. again, it's just that simple.

also, there are ways of stating things diplomatically and still get the same point across. bottom line, as a member of this community, i abide by the guidelines that have been placed to ensure the overall safety and sanctuary that PC should be. it's just that simple.

furthermore, who are we to accept a gift and cling to it as we attack or condemn the giver? then we try to twist and turn it into something else..all the while continuing with attacking/condemning the giver. it's beyond my comprehension. there's something wrong with this picture. it's a gift...accept it or don't. it's just that simple.

why is there a question when it's just that simple?

having said that, i refuse to justify anything further about myself, administration or docjohn here and our actions or inactions.

by the way, if this site weren't dealing with reality, would there be a need for the guidelines???? in dealing with reality, the need was seen FOR guidelines.

respectfully,

kd

Wants, your points are very eloquently stated and fair, in my opinion.

I would like to point out, though, that the mods have asked members of this forum to take issues to PM- discussing it with whomever they have a problem with. They have not asked that we dont' ask questions. They have asked that we don't make thread after thread opposing each and every decision made by the moderation team.

And to that, I would add that if you read a LOT of these threads, they aren't simple questions as to what is going on. Many are assumptions made about what is going on, and accusations. As my therapist has taught me, that's not a "true" question. A true question is one that you ask to gain understanding, not to point fingers, rail against someone, or suggest that they "should" have done something differently. From my perspective, most (not all) of the threads that have launched into so many conflicts and problems lately have been accusation threads- not questions.

I hope it's clear what I mean by that.

Angela

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furthermore, who are we to accept a gift and cling to it as we attack or condemn the giver? then we try to twist and turn it into something else..all the while continuing with attacking/condemning the giver. it's beyond my comprehension. there's something wrong with this picture. it's a gift...accept it or don't. it's just that simple.

~~~~~~~~~i haven't figured the quote feature out.....but i agree with KD. i don't have the resources to start a site like this and i sure don't have the education to keep it all going. i'm grateful for PC and i respect Doc John and the Mods. i believe that they do a helluva job...pattynearlynormalnow

What I think is great about this post is people are thinkging...they are digging down. They are focusing on freedom of speech and not the darkness that keeps them numb.
What I don't get though is that this is a site to help, support, encourage and yet when one person totally agrees with the mods/DocJohn they throw out "there are plenty of other sites". So, If I say I am having a really horrible day and I want to run away and hide...is that same person going to say..."there are plenty of places to hide."?

Anyway...glad this post has been good for the most part and people are communicating back and forth.

i did not realize that the thought of like it or leave it was in the quote that i took from KD's post. however, it is in there and i don't endorse that concerning this thread. i do support it when someone refuses support or creates havoc just because they can.......sorry if you thought that i endorsed that idea. xoxo pat

((((((((oksomaybeimnuts has the right idea! )))))

If we cannot feel that we can state our minds, thoughts & feelings in a support forum & under "General" on top of this

What's the point? Freedom of speech is Number #1 right; as long as you do not viciously "attack another individual" (Heavy on the individual part!) If you are just sharing what you're feeling; is that a crime? One single word in the entire human language is a "potential trigger"...so is turning on your computer, TV or radio..........

So, what's the BIG flaming issue here? Who's reality is really real?? According to "Community Nazi Guidelines?"

I know....I overstepped my bounds...kill me

Anti-Hallmark DAYZEE9

From my perspective, it isn't a point of following or leaving, per se... but of changing.

Yes, we all can speak our minds to the detriment of another. And most of us have, right here on this site. (But it's not a matter of not being able to do it "anymore." We were never allowed to if it wasn't supportive.)

Learning how to speak our minds, deal with our feelings, sift through our thinking... AND posting that information in a postive, communicative and respectable manner is the point.

Sometimes I think we (collectively at times) forget that the very act of POSTING encompasses therapy for us. This is a process... of online, layman-type?, group therapy, and we grow, and progress in our own discovery and solutions by reading and responding, by absorbing and learning how to be supportive. The very things we can find to complain about, can very well be indicative of our need because of our dx.

none of those things covered my point but what you say makes good sense sky. anyway my questions have been answered. thank you.

(((((((((((((((((((((((((_sky)))))))))))))))))))))))))))

I am humbled in your presence........

DAYZEE9

DAYZEE9 , as it was said before without the Guidelines we would have chaos(sp)
Angie

Dayzee, you might check your PMs. Pat

gee thank you.

i would like to clarify something. never once did i say "there are plenty of other sites". never once did i allude to that statement.

when i spoke of a gift, i was speaking of kindness and gracious acceptance, and followed it with...it's that simple.

ppl, there were no lines to read between there.

wow

this thread it totally hurting my brain

((((Kimmy))) I didn't read that into it either...but I know where your heart is. Perhaps other members don't know you as well.

Going back to the original subject line... I agree that by this very thread we are trying to deal with reality...and that it hasn't been quenched shows that the site can deal with many of our non-reality too!

Speaking for myself, and hoping you add yourself in along the way, I do have trouble determining "reality." Not in the psychotic sense of the word (though there are members here who are struggling with that too) but in what IS real, and what might not be. (See my reply to DocJohn's question ... what I wrote about truth and knowing who's truth it is... same issue.)

Because by my coming here to psychcentral I admit I have a struggle with a mental issue, and in that admittance and by agreeing to the guidelines, I allow -no, I EXPECT - DocJohn (who I assume is in touch with reality most of the time, ballgames excepted) and those mods he has placed "over" me... to regulate the reality I find here.

We need parameters. As we deal with our own issues, we "test" those parameters to make sure they're real, and that it's still safe. Sometimes we do so kicking and screaming.

Sorry LMo if that hurt your brain more ... (((hugs))))

GREAT BIG HUGS AND WET DOGGIE KISSES TO EVERYONE WHO HAS PUT THEIR MINDS TO WORK AND HAS THOUGHT ABOUT ALL OF THIS.
The thing about life...this is what makes it revolve.
We have common bonds that brought us together like depression, lonlieness, personality disorders, etc...
however, we all are individuals with our own thoughts brewing in our head.
Each of you have a voice. Each of you see things in a different light. Each of you were brought up with a set of beliefs that you still live by today.
Use your voice to go further, be stronger, live healthier.
Use your voice to heal.
No one here is right or wrong. Keep feeling, keep writing, keep dreaming!
((((((((((((((((((((to all)))))))))))))))))))))))))

I like that saying at the end of the post, it is really good

I hope this post will put closure on this thread, allowing us to all move forward

Take care,
DE