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#1
Nov 29, 2009, 05:55 PM
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I am glad to be back home in my bed with my boys(cats) but that is about it. I thank I have made a discovery of a huge trigger....my husband. That's right Mr. Perfect is my trigger. That is why I am not happy about being home. I blew up last night about all is expections of me. I don't want to decorate for Christmas or have anything to do with it this year. I am sick of all the fakeness. Why do we do this and that if it means nothing to nobody? All along making us crazy and hate/dread this season.
 Tuesday is my P dr. appointment. Praying for sedation for the season January 5 will not get here soon enough.(that's when everything goes back to normal crazy)
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#2
Nov 29, 2009, 06:02 PM
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Depressed Dear....I can sooo relate to your feelings re the holidays.I have been pretending for years! The last best Christmas, believe it or not was in 1999 after my sister completed suicide on the 17th of Dec. I made reservations and took my daughter to ashville for xmass eve and day. We had a beautiful time. I guess the reason I am telling you this is that , if possible, do something totally different this year. Get out of town. Or volunteer time to one of the many charities needing help. whatever.....a change in the same ole routine can make a difference. Good luck and keep posting!
__________________
  ToniH
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#3
Nov 29, 2009, 09:06 PM
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(((Depressed Dear)))
__________________
It is a miracle that I have survived thus far and I strive to help others see miracles in every day life.
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#4
Nov 29, 2009, 10:11 PM
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I am changing things up a lot this year. Not sure if it will be good or bad. Just got to get the family on board with just 4 or 5 christmas tree's last year I went all out with 14. Funny thing is as long as they have their tree and the one downstairs they are happy...it is my husband that is on my case about it.
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#5
Nov 29, 2009, 11:47 PM
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Just 4-5 Christmas trees?!
Down from 14!? Clearly I'm out of touch. People are putting up more than one tree, or one full-size and one miniature tree? Personally, Depressed Dear, I would find it extremely difficult to fault you on desiring to scale back your holiday plans. Celebration does not require excess. (But that's just me...)
__________________
My dog  mastered the "fetch" command. He would communicate he wanted something, and I would fetch it.
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 Elysium
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#6
Nov 30, 2009, 11:58 AM
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I'm not putting up 1 tree this year. Just don't feel like digging it all out then putting it away. I live alone. I did get some decorations out and outdoor lights. Just not in the mood.
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#7
Nov 30, 2009, 12:29 PM
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(((((((((((depressed dear)))))))))))))))))
i don't celebrate christmas anymore, & i can tell you i don't miss it at all!!!!
__________________
dx Bipolar I  Current meds: Lithium, Depakote, Risperdol, Zoloft, Trazadone =============================== "Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall All the king's horses And all the king's men Couldn't put Humpty together again." That's me - just tryin' to get put back together again...... |
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#8
Nov 30, 2009, 01:48 PM
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((((((((DD))))))) Gee, if you guys want, you can come out here, we have 180 acres of fir trees in various stages of growth. Bring your own tinsel and lights... We don't have reindeer this far south, but we do have moose and LOTS of wild pigs....
Babbling aside, fantastic that you found what was triggering you. Sounds like a serious talk is needed and a serious foot - putting down, or putting down of the foot or however that works. Little wonder that christmas send s shivers of dread down your spine. I'm kind of the opposite. I MIGHT mop the floor for Christmas and it MIGHT be noticeable  Huggs and may the holiday season bring you happiness, whether you celebrate it traditionally or not.
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#9
Nov 30, 2009, 10:33 PM
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Y'all are all so funny and right. I love to decorate any and everything....but....you know I do it cuz it brings joy to me. I always said I wouldn't do it if I didn't love it. Just now it has become "expected" and I don't find anything joyful when forced. Have you ever been forced to be creative?
The bigger issue here is husband wants my issues to be Sshhhhhhhhh. And if things don't look normal... towns people may start to talk...... we couldn't have that now could we?
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| lonegael
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