[lost_inthecrowd]

Hi everyone! I was looking around for a depression support group and I came across this. Wanted to join and reconnect with actual human beings in some way!

Sometimes there is so much to say and no good way to say it...

You have to remember that even though living is difficult there are still small kindnesses in the world. I remember one time in high school there was a boy who sat next to me at lunch one day in junior year. It threw me off, as I would always sit by myself out on the brick ledge outside. Little did I know he was suffering from depression too. We barely talked but I knew he understood me from the look in his eyes. Unfortunately we never got around to becoming friends or even talking about our lives. He took his life soon after. Needless to say I was shocked.

But I'll always remember that day he sat with me. It was really comforting to me. In a weird way I hope that kind of feeling happens again in this place.

I think that times are rough, especially now. I actually managed to find a job in Oct 2009 only to lose it about a week and a half ago. There is so much importance placed on jobs but how long can a person go to work feeling dead inside? What about helping each other instead of competing with each other? I'm sure we're not all heartless--there is compassion in us.

Again too much to say and I'm not sure about how this is coming across. If anyone is out there I would love to hear from you or just post a "hi". How are you all doing?

[darkpurplesecrets]

((((lost_inthecrowd))))

Welcome to PC and thank you for posting. I hope you will find the support and friendship here that you are looking for. There are so many wonderful and caring people here who can encourage you along the way. Many have been where you are or in a similar place at some point. But I am glad you have decided to become a part of PC. Do you see a t or a counselor? Just wondering.

I am sorry that happened to you in high school. That must have been really hard to deal with. Especially not really knowing him but making a connection. And as far as your job, I am sorry you lost that too. I hope that you will find another soon.

It is hard to go to work when you feel dead on the inside. To paint on a face each day that says I am okay, and to perform when you do not feel like performing at all. Sometimes in life that is how we have to do it at least until we are ready to look inside and see where those feelings are coming from.

I know for me, sometimes it is all I can do to look at the world. And putting on that face is so hard and I just really want to shut off and shut down. But doing what we need to do to make it is how we get from one day to the next. It is hard when we are not sure what is going on within. But maybe you have taken the first step here to being able to look at what is going on.

Reaching out is a first step. As you feel more comfortable you will be able to open up a little more. Please take your time and look around. I hope you will keep posting and reaching out. There is lots of groups and things going on and you will soon fit right in and feel at home. Thank you again for posting. Looking forward to hearing more from you. Sending gentle hugs and loving thoughts.

dps

Welcome, lost_inthecrowd. Keep on posting. We can chat anytime you want.

Good luck.