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Old May 25, 2010, 05:00 PM
xRockettex xRockettex is offline
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Member Since: May 2010
Location: AL
Posts: 12
I know that I'm not alone, so why do I feel so alone?
I guess I should start with my dad abandoning us. (I was 10). Since then, we lost our house to foreclosure, had 3 repossessions, mom had 2 bankruptcies (which I'm blamed for one), we've been kicked out 2 from renting..and left rental houses 2 or 3 times for money issues. Basically, I have severe change issues. (could also have something to do with my suspected AS). Back to my dad, around here, it's a crime to love him still. So if I bring him up (or anyone else does), my mom calls him names, which upsets me. I've told her how I don't like these names before, but she doesn't care. She's a mean and cruel person sometimes, but other times she's loving (I really think she's bipolar). No one has been their normal self since he left. So, no one listens to my feelings anymore. When I try (which isn't often because of this) to express my feelings, everyone jumps to conclusions. They think I'm "trying" to be like other people. Like I'm "trying" to be "crazy". They think I'm using the internet to diagnosis myself (since I think I have Asperger's), so my mom wants to take my computer (which is all I have...I'm homeschooled,so I have no real friends - and I kinda like it that way). Anyway, mom can't afford a therapist for me, so she thinks she "tries" to talk to me. Now on to her husband: I don't like him. I know that's a normal thing, especially since its a new marriage, but he's a total hypocrite (and I know everybody is at times). He calls himself "my dad" (as if he's taking credit for raising me; he's only known my mom since Christmas, and I don't like it). He always says it, too! And he's too strict! Don't tell me to talk to him, because we've tried, and he's just like that. There's a lot more..but this was more of a vent, and I have to admit after pausing several times to listen to music..and do other things, I feel much better now. I'm now not sure if this is truly depression, or just another Autism meltdown. thank you for reading anyway :].

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  #2  
Old May 26, 2010, 01:51 AM
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Aunt Donna Aunt Donna is offline
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Member Since: Nov 2008
Location: Northeast Louisiana
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Sounds like your teenage years are less than ideal. We are here for you. Feel free to vent.
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He is still working me to make me what I ought to be... and does He have a job.
Aunt Donna formerly faylowell
I really need someone to talk to..
I really need someone to talk to..
  #3  
Old May 26, 2010, 06:16 AM
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roxyskater roxyskater is offline
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Member Since: Apr 2009
Location: Saratoga, NY USA
Posts: 126
Im sorry you are feeling so alone....you have some issues of abandment due to your childhood, all the loosing stuff, all the moving, and the lose of your father. you can talk to me anytime Im here, we are all here to listen and give support. God Bless.

SIncerely,

Roxy
  #4  
Old May 26, 2010, 12:18 PM
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shaggy dog shaggy dog is offline
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Member Since: May 2010
Location: Texas
Posts: 245
I'm sorry you are dealing with so many issues xRockettex. If writing down that post helped you to feel better maybe you can benefit from journaling. I know keeping a journal has helped me alot through the years. shaggy
  #5  
Old May 27, 2010, 07:58 AM
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SophiaG SophiaG is offline
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Member Since: May 2008
Location: North East USA
Posts: 1,427
man, your family has gone through a lot since the divorce. That's probably why they arent themselves, because of all the stress due to money issues.
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“In depression . . . faith in deliverance, in ultimate restoration, is absent. The pain is unrelenting, and what makes the condition intolerable is the...feeling felt as truth...that no remedy will come -- not in a day, an hour, a month, or a minute. . . . It is hopelessness even more than pain that crushes the soul.”-William Styron
  #6  
Old May 27, 2010, 06:06 PM
TheByzantine
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Quote:
I know that I'm not alone, so why do I feel so alone?
Hello, xRockettex. You are alone it seems. People talk at you but you have little input.

Please continue to post. We will try to help you as much as we can.

Peace.
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