[Ithurts]

Sometimes when I'm depressed the idea of having sex is repulsive.

Why is that?

[sugahorse1]

Because a sign of depression is when you no longer enjoy doing the things that you used to. And when you are depressed, you just want to be comforted. Sex often takes you out of that comfortzone and leaves you vulnerable - a situation you are able to overcome when you are with a person you love and trust.
But when you are depressed, it really feels like you are opening up a vulnerable part of yourself.
Not sure how much sense that made, but that's from my experience

[Ithurts]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

Because a sign of depression is when you no longer enjoy doing the things that you used to. And when you are depressed, you just want to be comforted. Sex often takes you out of that comfortzone and leaves you vulnerable - a situation you are able to overcome when you are with a person you love and trust.
But when you are depressed, it really feels like you are opening up a vulnerable part of yourself.
Not sure how much sense that made, but that's from my experience

That is a very good explanation. Usually, I'm a sexual person. But sometimes (when the dark feeling comes) I feel really naked as if there weren't enough clothes in the world that can cover me. I hate that feeling it's so creepy.

[REINE D AMOUR]

it is normal,when i am really down it is hard to move .

[Ithurts]

Originally Posted by REINE D AMOUR

it is normal,when i am really down it is hard to move .

Trust me there are times when I'm depressed that the idea of getting up to go to the bathroom is a major task. One day I'll have to invent a bed that turns into a toilet bowl for this issue.

(Note to self: Must find a good plumber.)

[lonegael]

Sex kind of requires giving as well as receiving, and feeling joy in both. Depression drains to the point that receiving creates guilt, giving is impossible, and joy is not in the picture. let's face it, hon, a nice back rub and holding, yes. That sounds like you would do well with that. Sex, some other time. HUgggggggsssss.

[Ithurts]

Originally Posted by lonegael

Sex kind of requires giving as well as receiving, and feeling joy in both. Depression drains to the point that receiving creates guilt, giving is impossible, and joy is not in the picture. let's face it, hon, a nice back rub and holding, yes. That sounds like you would do well with that. Sex, some other time. HUgggggggsssss.

OMG your right about the guilt! When I'm depressed I feel sex is wrong, even though I know it isn't. It feels like I'm doing something evil and I try to avoid it, if possible.

I do like to be held when I'm depressed.

[Ithurts]

BTW- I think this really confuses my BF. I'm not trying to act strange but my emotions do things I can't control.

[sugahorse1]

My bf also battles to understand why I'm just not interested when I'm depressed. But that's the way things are.
I also just want to be held

[Ithurts]

Originally Posted by sugahorse

My bf also battles to understand why I'm just not interested when I'm depressed. But that's the way things are.
I also just want to be held

Hugs Sugahorse

Why can't they just understand when depression gets bad, passion goes out the window?

If I'm sad, I don't want someone ripping my clothes off. I want them to make me some soup.

[lonegael]

I think for guys, they see us depresed and they want to comfort. Comfort is touching and hugging, hugging is giving for them which quickly becomes what is for them soemthing that is the most affirming act btween lovong people, sex. No offense to the men I know, but my guy firends have often been kind of like this. They don't have to love to have sex, but if they love, they almost have to have sex to affirm it. Depression screws that whole emotional language up for them in a big way. If I am wrong, come on guys! help me out here!!!!! HUGGS alll!

[Ithurts]

Originally Posted by lonegael

I think for guys, they see us depresed and they want to comfort. Comfort is touching and hugging, hugging is giving for them which quickly becomes what is for them soemthing that is the most affirming act btween lovong people, sex. No offense to the men I know, but my guy firends have often been kind of like this. They don't have to love to have sex, but if they love, they almost have to have sex to affirm it. Depression screws that whole emotional language up for them in a big way. If I am wrong, come on guys! help me out here!!!!! HUGGS alll!

I've dated a lot of guys who said they can easily have sex and walk away. I have no idea how they can do that. But maybe it's in the physical design of the body.

A man has sex it's only one part of him involved.
A woman has sex and her whole body is being taken over by someone else.
A man has sex, it never hurts.
A woman has sex, sometimes it hurts.

In real life, I do flirt a lot- but I don't sleep around by choice.

I guess I like the attention more then the actual act. But when I'm depressed I can't even flirt.

Depression ruins everything.