I'm worth nothing, I am nothing. I can't do anything right.

I just wish I could go to sleep and die. I'm tempted to take too many pills and die. Why must I feel so crappy?

[Bluesummers]

Well, I can say with confidence, you CAN do something right. After all, you've just done something right by choosing to come here, and make a thread. Thats a positive thing to do. I know that we've not met until now, but even as a stranger, right now, I care about you.

Would you be ok with sharing whats made you feel this depressed? Its ok if you don't feel comfortable, or if it would be a trigger.

[Sabrina]

I am sorry you are feeling so terrible. I can only say that I hope this feeling passes very soon.

[notablackbarbie]

oh ((melissa.recovering)) ! *chokes on familiar lump in throat* You are not alone in this pain. My words suck, but many are here and care...

[googley]

((((((((((((Melissa))))))))))))

I'm so sorry you are in pain. I hope it goes away quickly. Can you call your T to talk about it?

[Miracle1986]

(((melissa)))
I hope you feel better soon.

Originally Posted by googley

((((((((((((Melissa))))))))))))

I'm so sorry you are in pain. I hope it goes away quickly. Can you call your T to talk about it?

Thanks to everyone for your replies. The fact that you care means so much to me.

To answer your question Googley, I have no T at the moment. I'm still on a waiting list to get one.

[Rohag]

((((((( Melissa.Recovering! )))))))

Originally Posted by melissa.recovering

I'm worth nothing, I am nothing. I can't do anything right.

Horrid feelings, those. As agonizing as the present is, I feel you have acquired excellent tools to defuse the assaults of your mind. May you find the strength to employ them.

I look over at you present post count and think how that number can never tell the real story of the wonderful, caring poster behind it. You've touched so many, Melissa.

[larakeziah]

i'm sorry you're feelin this way right now and i hope it passes before you harm yourself! Sending hugs and positive thoughts your way, take care

[Kiffygirl0793]

(((((Melissa.Recovering))))))

[11PM]

Originally Posted by melissa.recovering

I'm tempted to take too many pills and die.

Here it sounds like you want to die.

Originally Posted by melissa.recovering

Why must I feel so crappy?

Here it sounds like what you want more is to enjoy life and not feel crappy.

So, which is it?
It's time to admit that it isn't that you want to die, but rather that you want to live an enjoyable life. There is a difference. Wanting one thing leads somewhere, wanting the other does not.

Just an observation.

[oceansend]

Beautiful and Aching Melissa,
So distraught and so shattered you feel; as if the walls around you were a dam breaking apart, releasing a flood of despair so hard not to sink into.
But you mustn't sink. Keep your head above the ever rushing seas of fear because there is so much more that isn't possible to see whilst amidst the crashing and towering waves of this tempest that blinds you.
How could anyone see past a fog so thick, or through winds so strong that it pains the eyes from opening?
Don't cast your anchor into this storm, sweet and aggrieved Melissa.
Even when you can't see the light on the horizon, it is there.
And it is very okay not to see it sometimes to. Sometimes all you can do is to reach out, (albeit blindly still), for the infinite reaching arms of Hope that knows where to find you when you are looking for her.
Hope will find you, dearest and most precious Melissa. And we are all here for you to see the hope and promise that shines so brightly for you, even for the days where the darkness of a storm is covering your eyes away from it.
So, please know that even when you can't see it- that it is there, as beautiful and true as your very own beautiful soul; and we will all hold tight to it for you and keep it strong and bright, until you can use it on your own, to bring you safely ashore.
So pull up your anchor, precious girl, we're all on deck with you and it's time to set sail.
Though it may be trying and it may be frighting, please fight to make it ashore.
You will make it to shore.
And when you do, lay your hand print in the sand. Because there is only one in the world that is you. Truly unique an truly beautiful. A gift to the world, with her own talents none other can do just the like, a mind that none other can think; eyes that none other can see through, and a heart that dances to its own song. A beautiful heart, and a beautiful soul. And a mark- that no one else in the world can leave.
You are amazing and beautiful, unique and exceptional. You are as boundless as the same sea that binds you, and the same sea that will bring you home.
All my love,
Oceansend

[lonegael]

((((((((Melissa)))))))) Wish I could put an arm around your shoulders and tell you quietly and firmly exactly why you are worth something, yet all I can do is sit here on the other side of a computer screen and assure you that you are worth something. I believe that deeply. You feel so much pain right now, and you wish you could be free of it, but there isn't any guarantee that dying just now will be much of an answer. I feel firmly that this time will pass, far too slowly I know, but it will pass. Until then I and the others on this site will do what we can to support and cherish that precious, priceless person called melissa who send so much gentle wamth and hope in her messages to people who she might never meet, but still cares about. HUGGGGSSSS, dear one. How can anyone say that such a person as you is worthless?