I am so confused...

Hi everyone...
I am so confused...
I should be happy but I wasn't... This weekend I had family and friends around me. My daughter was here with my grandson and my friend, her daughter, and niece came to visit me. My daughter as always left and left me with the baby... I am use to that... my friend helped to care for him and her two she had with.

Here is the problem... by the time today came I was so excited when they left... I had wished they had left yesterday instead...

I have such a hard time with people and I shouldn't feel this way when it is life long friends and family....
What is wrong with me... I am getting so bad about being around anyone now. It use to be ok if everyone was here all at one time... now I want NO ONE around me at all...but then I dont' like to be alone either...no happy medium

It should have been a good weekend... I got a phone call from social security friday saying I was accepted for disability... I was happy about that yet unhappy I had everyone here...I hate feelings...they totally confuse me.

Thanks for listening...
Somebody

{{{{{{{{{somebody}}}}}}}}}}

Congratulations on your disability being approved!!!!! Good for you

You are not alone in this hun.....I have been like that too....people I care about being around me making me nervous and wanting them all to leave. When I talked about this during therapy, my therapist suggested that I may have had my comfort zone infringed on....I am the type that likes to be in control...having a schedule is important to me and when there is company around...my schedule is thrown out of whack.

How I learned to deal with it is to just recognize it and realize that it is ok...it is not going to last forever, they are going to leave soon, etc. I try to look at the positive in it all. I know how hard this is on you....I have been there. I still have some days when company drops by unexpectedly and I do get antsy about it. I know what it is now though and that does help.

Your feelings are all ok and normal....talk about it here when you can and if you are feeling stressed about it. We now how you feel and understand.



Heather

"The Pessimist complains about the wind, the Optimist expects it to change and the REALIST adjusts his sails." ~~~author unknown

(((Heather))) thank you for you input and the hug...it helps to know others feel the same way I do. Sorry it is taking me so long to get back here to respond to you. I have been offline for a while... just needed to be alone in my own thoughts.
Thanks again
Somebody

Hi! You know what it sounds like to me? It sounds like you are tired of being used. I'm sure you love your grandson, but your daughter is using you as her babysitter. You should tell her that you are tired of being used. I think it would make you feel alot better. Tell her that you love her and your grandson and you would like to spend time with them together. I think that would make you feel better. I have a friend who used to do that to me. She knew I would watch her son anytime and for free so she ended up using as her babysitter. I live her and her son dearly but I told her I would have to start charging her to babysit because she was taking advantage of my love for children. I am still very close friends with her and I still babysit for her on occasion. She now has 2 children ages 5 & 10. I love them all dearly. I am not being taken advantage of anymore though. I feel that in order for you to be happy, you must talk to your daughter about the situation.
Take Care,
tiredashell

I often feel that way when I'm surrounded by people, no matter how much I love them. In fact, when surrounded by those I love, I feel more pressure to pretend to be my old self, which takes a huge amount of energy.

When my son brings his 4 yr. old and 18 mo. old boys, I spend time playing with them and helping to care for them; but my son knows that I REQUIRE some time to be alone during the visit. It gives me a chance to recharge my batteries so that we can all enjoy each other when I feel better. I have also told my son not to leave the boys with me for long periods of time, unless it's time for them to go to bed. I just get overwhelmed after awhile and have to take a break.

Could you just tell your family and close friends that, at some points during their visit you will have to excuse yourself for awhile so that you can have some down time? You should also tell your daughter that you sometimes become too exhausted when she leaves her daughter with you, and to always ask if you feel up to it prior to making any plans to do so.

Just my $.02