[Ardmore]

I can't find a reason to live anymore, my mother abandoned me for a drug addict, my sister hates me cause I hate my mom so she doesn't treat me like a little brother anymore, I wake at 3:30 AM every day, tried all the time.

I wait in the cold for hours so I can go to school in my old district, I barley have anyone on my side, I hate living I just want to die in my sleep.
Why can't I???

I feel anger all the time, the most little things piss me off, I cry myself to sleep almost all the time.

I want to be at peace but it seems like I can't have that either.

[thine_self_untrue]

Oh, Ardmore.

That's a lot of things to be upset about. Your pain is real and I am sorry for it. I cannot take it away, sadly. But we are here for you to support you in whatever way we can.

Please, believe that you are young and your life can get better. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not in months or years but know that things can improve and that you can be happy. It is possible, Ardmore. Believe in it!

Keep talking and posting so we know how you are, okay?

[Rohag]

Hello, Ardmore!

Originally Posted by Ardmore

I wake at 3:30 AM every day...

Poor sleep is a real killer. It will hinder all your efforts to get to a better place. This is something you might address with a doctor (if possible).

Looking at a couple of your other posts has made me wary of your mother. Sannah may have excellent insights to offer you regarding her. In any event, I suspect what you are experiencing is tied into the larger picture of your whole family.

Family clinicians sometimes talk about a "designated patient" -- one member the family blames as "the problem" (thanks, Fool Zero). In reality, they just shift the blame to the vulnerable "designated patient" to permit themselves to be blind to their own problems. The confusion and troubles of the "designated patient" are frequently entirely rational responses to wider family dysfunction.

I wonder if you've been maneuvered into that role?

[Ardmore]

Originally Posted by Rohag

Hello, Ardmore!

Poor sleep is a real killer. It will hinder all your efforts to get to a better place. This is something you might address with a doctor (if possible).

Looking at a couple of your other posts has made me wary of your mother. Sannah may have excellent insights to offer you regarding her. In any event, I suspect what you are experiencing is tied into the larger picture of your whole family.

Family clinicians sometimes talk about a "designated patient" -- one member the family blames as "the problem" (thanks, Fool Zero). In reality, they just shift the blame to the vulnerable "designated patient" to permit themselves to be blind to their own problems. The confusion and troubles of the "designated patient" are frequently entirely rational responses to wider family dysfunction.

I wonder if you've been maneuvered into that role?

I never was "The problem", but things do change I guess.

Originally Posted by thine_self_untrue

Oh, Ardmore.

That's a lot of things to be upset about. Your pain is real and I am sorry for it. I cannot take it away, sadly. But we are here for you to support you in whatever way we can.

Please, believe that you are young and your life can get better. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, maybe not in months or years but know that things can improve and that you can be happy. It is possible, Ardmore. Believe in it!

Keep talking and posting so we know how you are, okay?

Thank you, I will

[hanners]

Originally Posted by Rohag

Family clinicians sometimes talk about a "designated patient" -- one member the family blames as "the problem" (thanks, Fool Zero). In reality, they just shift the blame to the vulnerable "designated patient" to permit themselves to be blind to their own problems. The confusion and troubles of the "designated patient" are frequently entirely rational responses to wider family dysfunction.

OMG that was so me growing up. *sigh*

[Can't Stop Crying]

So sorry Ardmore, keep on trying!

[Tazmania Tiger]

Originally Posted by Ardmore

I can't find a reason to live anymore, my mother abandoned me for a drug addict, my sister hates me cause I hate my mom so she doesn't treat me like a little brother anymore, I wake at 3:30 AM every day, tried all the time.

I wait in the cold for hours so I can go to school in my old district, I barley have anyone on my side, I hate living I just want to die in my sleep.
Why can't I???

I feel anger all the time, the most little things piss me off, I cry myself to sleep almost all the time.

I want to be at peace but it seems like I can't have that either.

Taking your life isnt the right choice. I can say that myself. You need to find something or someone that you can express your pain with when no one else will listen. I've walked through my life so far waiting for someone to change it for the better. Yes my thoughts have turned suicidal and I've wondered what the point of it all was but you have to keep going. You need experience as much life as you can. Theres always good out there somewhere

[I Want Change]

i hope things get better for you

[Ardmore]

Thanks for all the replies but I'm not feeling any better today, just got an email from my so-called sister, after what she said to me.

I can't find the words to describe how terrible I feel

[Rohag]

Originally Posted by Ardmore

I can't find the words to describe how terrible I feel

I'm sorry
Wishing you a space untouched by anger or sadness.

[Ardmore]

Originally Posted by Rohag

I'm sorry
Wishing you a space untouched by anger or sadness.

[feary]

This is the only life you have, only one. What happens if you do die? then what? nothing and you will never know. So might as well live. Just find a way to appreciate whatever you can and enjoy yourself. Live large. All the best.

[Ardmore]

Doing better today, I've came with terms with a few things and I feel things are starting to turn a corner.

[AvidReader]

Sounds like you got some nice, encouraging responses from the forum members. That's good!