Self image

Ah yes, the self image is a-taking a beating.
The drugs help but they don't do it all, and they don't do quite enough, sometimes.

The self image is taking a beating mainly because I am being very self-evaluating at the moment. This is because I think there is this woman who likes me.

Such a possibility brings me to study myself closely, and try to see what I would have to bring to a relationship.

And the answer is: not a lot!

So yes, I have a long way to go.

Hi justaman, I've forgotten if you are doing therapy in addition to your medications. I don't believe that medications are even intended to "do it all". Rather they help balance the chemicals so that talk therapy can be effective. Think like you've got a van (talk therapy) to take you to your destination (wellness) but you're sidewalk is too low and you can't reach up high enough to step onto the van when it arrives. No matter how much the van comes it can't take you.

But the medicine is like a step-stool that allows you to reach the entrance of van when it comes. The two together can offer help. If you take the meds but never take the effort to get aboard the van when it comes, all you are is a guy standing outside on a stepstool.

One things that can help self-image includes positve affirmations. It seems silly, but the point is we have these negative thoughts running around in our heads. At first saying positive affirmations seems silly and pointless. But if you do it enough you can begin to replace the negative thoughts with more positive, realistic ones. You have to also realize that these negative thoughts come from depression, they don't reflect reality, so you deserve to find ways to block those negative thoughts out however you can.

You might also try to just stop the self-evaluation thoughts when they are piling up, like in this situation. When I find myself focusing on things that are unhealthy for me, I tell myself to STOP, if I am alone I even say it out loud. Some people keep an image in their mind like a train pulling to a halt to accompany this. For me this works rather well with anxiety and racing thoughts.

This might be helpful to just get you to stop the hurtful self-evaluation thoughts so that you can just take it as it comes with this woman... see what develops without anticipating. You can't predict what she will and won't like about you... have some faith in yourself, try to relax and let her discover those positive traits about you... and work hard to believe them when they come.

Good Luck.!