[ballet_girl]

One of the things that I'm starting to learn about myself is that I'm an introvert. I have friends and enjoy hanging out with them but I also need a lot of alone time to recover because it drains my energy. When I was abroad I lived in my own room and I felt that it really helped with my depression. Of course I don't think that was the only reason for my depression going away, but it really helped to have alone time to reflect, not be super stressed out all of the time about scheduling who uses the stove or the shower at what time, your roommate waking you up in the middle of the night, or when you need to stay up late to do homework and your roommate wants to sleep.

I had to start apartment hunting when I was still abroad, and all of my close friends graduated last semester, so I didn't have anybody I knew to room with. I talked it over with my parents and they said that they would be willing to pay for me to have my own room rather than room with somebody i found off of craigslist or something. Now my dad is thinking he might get laid off soon and asked me to get a roommate. I reacted really angrily because it is probably too late for me to find somebody to live with, my boyfriend was planning on coming to visit me and won't be able to if I have a roommate, and I already signed the lease so I can't move in with anybody else. My parents realized how upset I was and said they would find a way to afford it, but now I feel so guilty. I honestly don't think I can share a 12x12 studio apartment with somebody that I don't know, both for practical reasons and emotional ones. I'm thinking about taking a second job, but I still don't know if I would make enough to cover my expenses and half of rent by only working the hours between my classes and my other part time job. I'm honestly thinking about losing weight and becoming a 'dancer', which I know is ridiculous but its the only thing I can think of.

And the thing is, I know this is so petty of me and I should just suck it up. So I hate myself for not being able to

[Rohag]

Hello, Ballet_girl! One way or another, having your own space will make life easier for you and thus you easier on others.

As best you can, respect your self-realizations (introversion; need for privacy).

Aside: May dancing be in your future, professional or otherwise.