Why???

Why am i still sucking air if i am still so miserable....I am convinved depression is the closest thing death without actually being dead. Thinking bout going back into the hospital this weekend but i will wait till pdoc tues and see what he thinks. My pdoc works for the hospital i go to so I figure he should have some say. That all.

Look forward to seeing the pdoc? :-) Sorry you feel so bad Melissa!

Thinking of you Melissad81. Hope you start to feel better soon. Depression is awful. You deserve to feel better.

Elana

(((((((Melissa))))))))) I know what you mean. When my depression gets really bad, I frequently refer to myself as a "breathing corpse." But we are alive and our lives are worth fighting for, even though I know it doesn't feel like that all the time. Remember that you're not alone in this. Talking to your pdoc sounds like a good idea. I hope he's able to help and that you get some relief soon.

Hes calling it a med review but doesnt seem to do much wi th meds it seems to me. Something says trust him though. I dont know why. If i dont start to feel the slightest glimpse of relief soon theres gonna be hell to pay. He can f the county if that is what he wants to do while im inpatient and in partial but its my $$$$$$$ now. So we will see how it goes. Maybe miracles do happen and maybe one will tomorrow. Until then back to norm not eating, no motivation/energy, in bed 24/7 sleepimg or not pretty much, hell mom did my laundry yesterday so i wouldnt wear the same clothes for the 4th week without washing them, i feel so completely hopeless sometimes i wonder if im just imagining imstll alive. To be continued tomorrow...