will it never...

nah. not me.

Did Denny's last year. Don't know if they have those where you are. I might do the same tomorrow; have to see how I feel. Otherwise I have a turkey pot pie in the freezer

pot pie... I remember them... only liked them with a really crispy crust! Denny's down here are icky.... I see my neighbor across the street isn't home...so I guess they both had to work today... he's a chef and she's a waitress...2 different places.. so something's open.

I;ll feel guilty if i go out and eat and don't take my mom. What a process. It's better to stay home and avoid. I'm on the computer right now so no one tries to call me and pretend to care "last moment" Merry Christmas??? How awkward, how insincere... same reason I'm not calling anyone. I've failed miserably...and I do every year. Every year since being hurt... I tried to overcome it at the beginning... that mind or matter thing... I could do anything.. even injured. I learned better.

I keep trying to think my way out of this blue funk... "things will change" "there's no doomsday" "I'm worth something" "it's not my fault"

bologna.

Hang in there. We're all there for you. I hope that you're feeling better. I want you around for some time...I don't want your life to be over as soon as you may want it to end!