[optimistic1]

Hi to anyone reading this. I am grateful to you for taking a few moments of your life to read about the madness in my head.

I have been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety disorder, which sounds relatively mild considering what it feels like inside my head. I am seeing a therapist once a week and taking meds, but I feel the need to seek out other souls who are actually going through the same type of issues I am.

I am not suicidal, I am deathly afraid of hurting other people. I wish I was suicidal, it seems like it would be easier for me to handle than the thought of hurting someone I love. I feel so crazy even though I have been told by numerous mental health professionals that I am not crazy and the thoughts are a manifestation of other issues.

God, please let me find someone who understands...

[Elana05]

Hi optimistic1,

Yes, I can relate. I bet there are many others here who can relate too. The idea of "hurting someone you love" might be a very old feeling...
I hope you will keep posting. Depression and anxiety are painful and intolerable but good for you for seeking help. Sending supportive thoughts your way.

[dumbunny]

Hi,

I sure can relate to what you're feeling. I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety. For a few years, I went to therapy weekly and now its monthly unless I need to go a little extra. I also am not suicidal but wish I would not wake up each morning, however, those thoughts are getting less. Please keep posting here and believe that you are not alone in this.

[alwaysrejoice]

You are totally not alone. I am off work right now because my symptoms are so severe. That depresses me even more! Its like I cant do anything right. I'm getting good help though and ill be ok again soon, so will you.

[Mustkeepjob32]

You are definitely with supportive people on this forum. BTW, seeing a therapist and being on meds is a great thing! I am on meds but I need to get a therapist. And it is great to have this forum and know that there are so many people going through the same hardships. I know it has helped me.

[Marla500]

Originally Posted by optimistic1

I am not suicidal, I am deathly afraid of hurting other people.

I had similar thoughts for the longest time, just being afraid that I would do something unintentional to hurt someone else, or even in my sleep (which I guess is highly unlikely). I had a Pdoc ask me once if I had these types of thoughts and this is part of what he used to determine I was depressed. now when I get them I try to remember they are inaccurate and not dwell on them.

[gma45]

Originally Posted by optimistic1

Hi to anyone reading this. I am grateful to you for taking a few moments of your life to read about the madness in my head.

I have been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety disorder, which sounds relatively mild considering what it feels like inside my head. I am seeing a therapist once a week and taking meds, but I feel the need to seek out other souls who are actually going through the same type of issues I am.

I am not suicidal, I am deathly afraid of hurting other people. I wish I was suicidal, it seems like it would be easier for me to handle than the thought of hurting someone I love. I feel so crazy even though I have been told by numerous mental health professionals that I am not crazy and the thoughts are a manifestation of other issues.

God, please let me find someone who understands...

I can so relate, I have depression and have been having anxiety attacks which seem sometimes unbearable. Finally got on some antidepressants which I think are starting to help still would like to find a therapist but with no ins. and low funds it has not been easy. So glad you are not suicidal that will not help matters at all. Hopefully you will find what is hiding inside making you miserable. sending good thought's your way . Keep on posting it helps. It had sure helped me to know I was not alone.