[bluemountains]

I'm not sure which board to post this on because I can't figure out what is making me feel the way I do for the past several days. On the inside I feel agitated, restless, and angry. I can't make myself settle enough to finish the Christmas decorations with my children, and I put on a good face, but I really don't want to think about the holidays at work or at home. This is tough because I am a teacher, so holiday traditions are important at work, too. Also, I find that the weepiness seems to be creeping back in as well as some random negative thoughts I believed to be supressed for now.
I'm concerned that my recent med change could be the culprit (wellbutrin added to cymbalta), but I really wanted it to work, because the idea of going to the pdoc for myself is one I can't handle now. I spend so much time there lately with one of my sons. I had been doing great for a few weeks, and I am afraid that I might really be sinking back down-it's only been six weeks this time!
Maybe it's just my schedule-work all week, my t on Tuesday during the day, family t Tuesday evening, root canal Wed. evening, to court Thurs. to argue a ticket, Son 3 to testing on Friday (husband will do this, but I will worry!)

I just want normal for a little while!

Bluemountains

[Rohag]

Hello, Bluemountains!

Originally Posted by bluemountains

Maybe it's just my schedule...

It may not be just your schedule, but that grueling December schedule isn't helping.

Originally Posted by bluemountains

...the idea of going to the pdoc for myself is one I can't handle now.

Being good to yourself is part of being good to your family. Of course, adding another appointment to an already taxing schedule...

What are the most important things for you this December?

[Unrigged64072835]

Um, I'm not a doctor or anything like that, so if you can get a consult with your pdoc (even if it's over the phone) he or she may validate what's going on and the best way to proceed.

I do know that when I doubled my Wellbutrin dose I got restless and anxious. I read on the medication information sheet that I get with my prescription that it's a side effect of the medication. My pdoc gave me an anti-anxiety med (Buspar) to counteract that. (I can't take other ADs like SSRIs because I get pretty bad mood swings.) It may not work for you so it's important to consult with your pdoc.

It's really tough with your schedule (wow), but if you're not there for yourself, it makes it even harder to be there for your kids. I had to learn that the hard way--two hospitalizations and several med changes later, and I'm still trying to catch up on what I missed with my daughter (who has a learning disability and other issues that make it a challenge even when I'm stable).

Hope you start feeling better soon. (((bluemountains))) And when you find normal let me know, because I want it too! LOL

[bluemountains]

Thanks for the reality check Rohag and Fharraige! The schedule is overloaded, I know. I'll be talking to the t this week for advice before I go to the family doc next week-I will go with what they say, even if I don't like it. I think part of my anger is that ten years into treatment I know now that I will be medicated for the rest of my life and probably in therapy for much of it as well. The idea that it will never go away is quite daunting, but I'm working on it.
Meanwhile, the decorations are all out! The Christmas buzz has started with the family.

(((Hugs!)))
Bluemountains