[Puffyprue]

I dont know what to do with my life my life anymore, everyone said to me i should consider my self lucky i got my dream job and i live in paradise, i dont feel that way , well i really like my job and i am really good at it my CEO trusted me , i even became director of the month before and my CEO Begging me to stay but ...
I always wanted go to Kenya or middle east now my CEO even said i could go to Kenya if i stay .. whateever i want but i am still leaving ..this is something that i always wanted to be but now i dont want it anymore
i dont know what happened to me i became just so depressed lately and i used drugs so much and i hate my self morebecause i did stupid thing when iam high
Today is my bestfriend wedding, so me and my friend had a long talk and she thought iam depressed because i get my heartbroken but thats not true well maybe a little bit but...its long time ago
ijust dont know what i want anymore, i want a baby but i dont want them to grow thats weird i know ...but iam not emotionally stable for a baby and itselfish
iam just lost.. its seems like iam standing at the same spot watching everyone around me moving forward and left me far away behind

[*freak*]

Originally Posted by puffyprue

this is something that i always wanted to be but now i dont want it anymore

You know, it's normal in life to have certain dreams and goals that later change. People evolve and what we want at a certain point is not necessarily what we need later on. Nothing bad about that.

It's different, however, if it's your depression talking. Often when we're depressed we can't or don't feel like doing anything and things that are usually enjoyable become nothing but a burden. I wouldn't quit your job yet unless you're absolutely certain it's you that is making the decision and not your depression.

iam not emotionally stable for a baby and itselfish
iam just lost.. its seems like iam standing at the same spot watching everyone around me moving forward and left me far away behind

I don't think it's selfish to want a baby. You'd be selfish if you'd make one in spite of knowing that you're not ready for one and can't take care of it.

And I know the feeling of watching everyone else pass you by. What would you like? Where would you want your life to go? No need to decide anything right now, just think about it. Do you have a T that can help you through this difficult time?

Take care

[Rohag]

((((((( Puffyprue! )))))))

Originally Posted by puffyprue

...everyone said to me i should consider my self lucky i got my dream job and i live in paradise...

But -- and you know this all too well -- depression doesn't care you have your dream job and live in paradise. Depression seemingly can thrive on anything it chooses -- the past, the imagined future, genetics, any disturbance large or small, and on and on.

I hope you can get to Kenya and to any other place you desire. Yet I hope you get to those places at a time when you can really enjoy them and make memories that will cast a joyous light on your life.

Originally Posted by *freak*

I wouldn't quit your job yet unless you're absolutely certain it's you that is making the decision and not your depression.

This is wise advice. Thank you, *Freak*! Peace to you, Puffyprue!

[Puffyprue]

Quote:
Originally Posted by *freak*
I wouldn't quit your job yet unless you're absolutely certain it's you that is making the decision and not your depression.

i think it both myself and my depression so on May iam gonna leaves,, i need a long break , need to pick myself up and put it together. i dont know if i could *sigh*