[qwertywpg]

Joining a group I never thought I would have to and it took a very long time to.

About me..
I have been suffering what I think is stress induced severe depression and have been for about 8 years. It started some 12 years ago when I began to work from home (professional with office in the basement) and taking care of three kids. The stress began, but it eventually took a toll. Ridiculous anger, focusing on unimportant detail, not enjoying life, and beating myself up. Working from home meant only my family knew how bad it was.

Prior to all of this I was described as the person that people gather around because something good always happened if I was there. These days, I can't get myself out the door.

I am now separated, the soon-to-be-ex doesn't believe I have ever suffered form depression and I am making it all up. Her outlook has impacted my ability to get professional help, as I spent way too much time and energy on trying to help her understand. She couldn't see past the behaviors, and would rather judge than understand. She spent a lot of time telling just how everything she doesn't like in her life is my fault. We were together over 30 years, her opinion mattered.

I have finally figured out that what she thinks is completely unimportant, I do wish she would stop verbally beating me to make herself feel better.

We have have 50/50 custody of 3 teens. Communication is required. It can go from amicable to downright vulgar. The kids are doing okay, not surprisingly the middle son is having a hard time.

I did try some meds, but found that sleeping 20 hours a day was worse than suffering 24.

I am bright, well educated, normally very hard working, value family, loyalty, ethics & integrity, and the only one of the three male siblings that isn't addicted to alcohol or cocaine. (It was a rough childhood (alcohol, incest, physical abuse). I left home at 16, finished high school and 8 years later went to university, fished a masters, and became a CEO - while working from home. It took tenacity, I just don't seem to have anymore. These days it's an accomplishment if I get the dishes done. Being the best Dad I can be has kept me alive.

I haven't worked for 3 years and might just now be employable.

My Sanity test put me with severe depression.

On the good news side, I finally made an appointment with a psychiatrist and go Monday. And of course, I joined this group.

[Leed]

Hello and WELCOME! I'm glad you found us! This is a great place, and the people are wonderful. Here you will find not only answers, but plenty of support and friendship.

Depression is a terrible disease to have to deal with. I've been depressed since I was a small child, and I've been on meds for over 30 years. I fear the reason you slept too much on your meds was because the doctor didn't titrate the dosage correctly, and he should have lowered the dose until you didn't feel so medicated. Medications are really a God=send and have pretty much saved my life!

I'm so sorry that your "ex" didn't understand depression. It only takes a few minutes to read about it - it''s a shame she wouldn't take that amount of time to read about it so she'd understand a bit about what you were suffering from.

I hope your therapy goes well and you keep posting here. Take care and God bless! Hugs, Lee

[Rohag]

Hello & Welcome, Qwertywpg!

Originally Posted by qwertywpg

I did try some meds, but found that sleeping 20 hours a day was worse than suffering 24. ...

I finally made an appointment with a psychiatrist and go Monday.

I recommend you make sure the psychiatrist knows your history with those meds and their effects on you. If you are attempting to reenter the world of work, you probably need to minimize sedation.

Wishing you success with that appointment and all your efforts!