[beautifuldisaster78]

My diagnosis has changed through my life (I'm 32) but right now it's Complex PTSD, Dissociation, Major Depression, and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I was in the hospital last year for suicidal ideation. Since I have been out I have greatly improved and have been stable on meds since about February. I have not had any of that darkness or fog since February even when I've had problems.

However lately, things have not been good. Actually, externally they have. I have a great job, a great family, just moved to a nice house... but for the past two weeks or so I have been so overly emotional and I can't stop crying. (and I am not usually a big crier..especially in front of people.) I am not in that 'darkness' of depression where I want to die, but I am shaking, and anxious and tearful like every moment almost. I'm making myself physically sick.

A couple of my friends are having serious problems. One is leaving her husband, and the other has major depression and going through a rough time. I have been stressed out and worried about them and at first attributed my anxiety and tearfulness to worrying about them but I think there must be more to it than that because it just wont stop and I'm making myself sick and it's ridiculous. I don't see my psych dr until Sept (he's hard to get into) and my therapist...well... that's a long story but he's also off next week so I won't see him either.

Anyone ever go through a period where everything makes you cry and you can't stop? I had to leave work early today and took tomorrow off because I sat down at my bosses desk and just started bawling. I can't have this effecting my life this way. Any suggestions would be helpful. Thanks.

ps. I'm also very jumpy- startling easy and that's not normal either. No changes in meds since February.

[Blue Poppy]

Hello there,

For me, the crying is usually indicative of some depression. I have had the same experience at work, crying and having to leave. There was no trigger, I just started crying and couldn't stop. Take good care of yourself right now as your mood may be changing. I usually try to exercise a lot when this happens to me, as it has pulled me out of it in the past. If you can take a few steps back from all the stress, that would be good too. I hope the crying soon settles.

[shezbut]

(((beautiful disaster)))

Have you tried getting in touch with your Psychiatrist's nurse? That's usually a lot quicker. You could share you difficulties with her, which she will pass onto your P doc. He can then decide what can/should be done to help you through this time.

Gentle hugs to you ~ take care! And try not to think about your friends tough times too much, that can cause a lot of excessive stress and nervousness as your mind begins to imagine more.

[overdrainbow]

sorry to hear that your going through a tough time. maybe your scared that the same things that are happening to your friends can happen to you. i dont but i have those uncontrollable out crys sometimes but i think it's just my bad side catching up to me. i sometimes do things that i know are wrong. but don't care. and than it just creeps up on me. there's so much i want to change and dont really know how. i cant afford any pshsy too expensive. i just try to compare to other peoples misery in hopes that i can learn something to help myself with.at least you can really appreciate your life. thats good . i wouldnt know if what i got is good or bad sometimes. sometimes i feel as if i am a walking bomb about to explode. not dealing with inner issues from childhood is really messing me up. i cant even have a healthy relationship with my husband and as for my kids i really think i did more harm to them than good. its weird its like im in this box watching myself mess peoples lives but i cant do nothing about it. sad thing about it people actually believe im good. they see this innocent person who is incapable of doing any wrong little do they know im so evil. just in a scary way. meaning i don't bring bodily harm to no one i just do things that i know will severly hurt if they only knew. sad ,sick,i know but how do i change, i even tried god the superior being that didnt even have a hold on me. i guess i wud have to believe huh? if it was up to me i would sleep all day. just lay on my bed and never come out of my room but im forced to particapate in the madness we call society. oh god, i so tired. no one can possible understand what it is to me. what to do. i know i should be trying to help but here i go needed help myself. so sorry didnt mean to bring you down.