Life in a box

I have been out of the hospital for one month and I am once again on the first square. When I left the hospital I was on five med which felt like they were working however I stopped taking my Ativan cold turkey and had a seizure. The er doctor and my primary thought it would be best for me to stop taking lithium and cytomel. My primary also felt uncomfortable prescribing my mess, however after my pleas to do. Since my psychiatry appoint was a month away he agreed to renew my wellbutrin and remeron meds. But refused to prescribed Ativan. I have seen my therapist twice since being dicharged, I seem to only be able to see him every other week. Well I am tired of this run around and my depression is worse than ever. I have no way to escape this life. I have no one to care for my kids if I get hospitalized or if I choose to take my life. I have been thinking about how other mother's have taken their kids with them when they could no longer go on. I don't support what they ddi but I can understand why they did it. If a mother feels that there is no one to adequately care for younger children then taking them from forseen life of hell for them then you have to do what you think is the best way to help them avoid a life of hell. Let me say again that I would never take that step but I can see what their stAte of mind was.i

I am so sorry you are going through this. I can only hope that it will get better; is there another primary you could see or someone who would feel comfortable prescribing the meds? I don't know. I am so sorry.