[ArrMCee]

I'm getting used to it. My habits have flipped. This time last year, you wouldn't find me home on any night of the week.. I'd be out with friends, whether it be just hanging out watchin TV, or out doing something with them. But for the past month, I've gone out only 2 times to hang out with my friends. (And just a handful of times over the past few months)

Don't get me wrong, I go to work, the gym, carry on with my normal life.. But when I come home at night, I don't talk to anyone at all. I've done a complete 180 on my social life. Whereas I'd normally be the life of the party, the one "rallying the troops" to go out and have fun, the one that approaches people I don't know to make acquaintances for the night... Now, I'm the one who you never hear from. The one who shuts himself in.

But I'm ok with that... I have my job and my workout routine to keep me busy and motivated. I'm losing the urge to socialize with people intimately. Is there something wrong with this? I know I suffer from depression and this is a result of my depression... but.. is it a bad thing?

[whimsygirl]

Just my opinion, of course, but as long as you're okay with whatever your lifestyle is, who's to say that it's "wrong"? I would say it's only a "bad thing" if it's not the way you want things to be. Of course nothing's ever simple in the world of depression, but at least for the time being why not continue doing what makes you more comfortable..... Good luck with everything.

[Leed]

Hi ArrMCee ~ I agree with Whimsygirl pretty much. You just don't want to isolate. That's the worst thing you could do, even if it feels good. We tend to curl up and be by ourselves because it feels good that way == that's what depression "says" to us == it tell us to be alone. But when you isolate, you lose your friends cause they get tired of urging you to go out and you refuse time after time and you end up with no one. So force yourself to go out once iin awhile even when you don't want to. It will help you retaiin your friends.

I wish you the very best! Please take care of yourself! God bless. Hugs, Lee

.

[Puffyprue]

Like the others say nothing wrong about being alone as long as you dont have any problem with that, but on other thread you said loneliness has became source of your depression so its mean its not okay to be alone

[CgRgSm]

If you are asking me, you are asking a person who should know. I do not have any friends, and I never go out unless I have to (work, family). I stay in my pitch black room the rest of the time. Is it bad? Well, it depends on what you think. According to the Holy Bible, yes, it is bad, as it says "It is not good for man to be alone". But, if you're like me and don't believe in good or bad, you can just do whatever you want. Of course, looking at how you asked the question, you probably do believe in it. Other than that...being alone all my life I am miserable, don't know what happiness is, feel like no one will ever understand me, I have no confidence whatsoever, no self-esteem, no hope, no purpose... you get the idea. I have tried to be with people more often, but when I do, I feel even more alone.

[ArrMCee]

Thanks for the feedback, all. Really appreciate everyone on these forums and how helpful you all are. Truth is, I'm very confused. I'm not sure that I have any "real" relationships with anyone anymore... Everyone's just kinda here.

I realized that a lot of my friendships were based on smoking & drinking.. Kinda threw me for a loop, because those are two things I've done a good job not doing (for my mental and physical health) the past month or so.. Which means I haven't really talked to any of my "friends." I have lots of people throughout the day that I talk to, because I'm generally a charming and very friendly person, but no true confidants, ya know?

This is probably for another subject, but it's definitely tied in: I've had several really, really close friends and confidants... two of them were girlfriends, and the other 3 and I had a real close bond. But each of these close friends and I had fallings out (some more severe than others), and I don't talk to any of them any more. I think it keeps me from really letting anyone get close.. Lol I'm confused as ****.. But I know I'll figure it out eventually. Until then, I'll keep asking you all for advice, Thanks.

[feelingmislead]

Originally Posted by ArrMCee

Truth is, I'm very confused. I'm not sure that I have any "real" relationships with anyone anymore... Everyone's just kinda here.

I realized that a lot of my friendships were based on smoking & drinking.. Kinda threw me for a loop, because those are two things I've done a good job not doing (for my mental and physical health) the past month or so.. Which means I haven't really talked to any of my "friends." I have lots of people throughout the day that I talk to, because I'm generally a charming and very friendly person, but no true confidants, ya know?

I am in the same boat at the moment. When your drunk and having fun its easy to make friends but then you realize besides getting drunk you really have nothing in common with those people. When I was drinking I made so many acquaintances but I started to realize that I really didn't know these people. I guess it takes a while to meet new people who share your current interests.

Its crazy that I could literally always find someone to go drinking with, but still cannot find anyone who would go to the gym with me.