:(

Hi guys, I'm back! Ok, so I went to the emergency clinic and they sent me to the hospital where I had a horrible time. I got there on Monday at about noon and then left on Wednesday at about noon as well. They wanted to keep me there for a whole week but both my parents, myself, and my regular psychiatrist thought that was ridiculous. My mom got them to release me into her custody so I went home until Sunday night, and didn't really have any access to the internet so that's why I didn't update you all sooner.

The people at this hospital were really mean and not helpful at all. There was one nurse who was so kind and nice to me and the rest just treated me like I was a bother, which, is obviously not good for someone who was in the state that I was in. The psychiatrist was a huge asshole, and didn't care about me or my life at all. I saw the nurse practitioner shortly after intake and was crying hysterically, and she barely spoke a word to me.

While I was in the hospital, we did a lot of group therapy which was mostly dumb, in my opinion. We did art therapy on the first day, which I thought I would really like, but I hated it! The therapist asked us to draw a house, a tree, and a person, and then, get this: she FELL ASLEEP while we were drawing. She dozed off for about 20 minutes. So then, she "analyzed" our drawings by folding them into thirds and saying that the first part represented our past, the middle represented our present, and the third part represented our future. She claimed this was "a science". It was a complete was of time for me.

We later did music therapy which was also a total waste of time. She made us hold these little plastic easter eggs and shake them while she played a guitar and sang a song. I hated it and I felt like a kindergartner, and I was in the adult ward! It was just ridiculous.

On the plus side, I learned a lot about myself from the groups that were actually helpful. I learned that just talking about my problems and ranting or expressing myself doesn't really help me at all (though it does for a lot of people). I need constructive criticism, goals, and ways to help me cope as opposed to ways to let out my emotion. I have a need to figure things out rather than talk them out.

Anyway, thank you everyone for talking to me on here when I didn't have anyone. I don't know what I would have done without you all. Truly. <3