Today, I don't like me

Today I am dealing with the damage my depression has caused my family. See, my ex tried and tried to convince me to get help and I pretty much held my own and tried to do it all by myself.
Well, "all by myself" is what I got for my trouble.
I have seen a Psychiatrist, have a counselor, and read a lot about depression and how I can help myself when not in therapy.
But today I dont like me very much because of all the damage, pain, unrest, hurt, anger, tears, and more that my selfishness and stupidity has brought my (now ex) wife and daughter.
To their credit, my ex is the jewel she always was and is helping me cope with my issues while talking with me about our 23 years together that is no more. My daughter loves her daddy, always has, always will, and wants to see me get better. She also really wants me to come home, move back in, and restore our family. My ex is happy we no longer fight, welcomes me over to the house to visit with open arms, but wants nothing of a reconciliation that includes me moving back in. I hurt her too much and cut her too deeply emotionally for that to happen.
So that is where I am today.
Ya'll keep fighting the good fight and we will all prevail one day!

it sounds like a tough position you are in. but i am glad that you hav such a positive mindset, and that your ex and your daughter are responding (mostly) positively. Its not your fault... its the depression that caused it. try to keep that in mind. You hurt her, but it wasn't on purpose. regardless, things happened, and it will take time for her to get over it (if she ever does). Keep hanging in there!

It sounds like you have the right attitude and I wish you all the best in healing your personal relationships. Coming to terms with hurting people I love and my own personal relationships still plagues me. We'll keep on fighting!

I'm glad you have such great support. Your ex IS a gem in that she is willing to be there for you even after she was hurt so badly. And of course your daughter loves you. So you have some great support there -- you're very lucky!! Be sure to take advantage of it. When it gets bad, use them!

We CAN survive even with depression. I have severe clinical depression, and have had it since I was a small child. I'm now 63 yrs old -- so we can survive. I've been thru therapy off & on all thru my adult life, and I'll be on meds the rest of my life -- I've already been on them for about 35-40 years. So we do what we have to do to make it. And sometimes we feel just awful -- so we use our support system. And if we don't have one, we "wing it." LOL

I wish you the very best! Please take care of yourself & God bless. Hugs, Lee

Thanks Miswimmy1, hanging in there for sure!

Yes we'll keep fighting indeed!